Life Update: I Want To Live Today

Quick Story: On November 18th of this year, around 2 pm, I received a text informing me my good friend had transitioned from this life. I couldn’t believe the words on my phone screen. I read them over and over. I just talked to my friend on that Friday (Nov. 13th) so I figured someone, somewhere, had something mixed up. I decided to call his phone to let him know the foolery I had just received on my phone. He didn’t answer. So I texted him…no response. Then after about an hour or so of being in denial, his best friend called me to confirm what I didn’t want to believe. My friend had left the earth at the age of 35. I couldn’t grasp what I just heard. I kept saying out loud, “huh??” I got up from my desk to close my office door so no one would walk by and notice the sunken look on my face.

After gathering myself, I opened the files on my computer. I searched for a particular document I had been pondering on for a while. I was going to give this document to the powers that be at the so-called appropriate time. But after receiving the news I had just received, I realized that for this matter, there was no better time than the present. I edited the date and then printed my resignation letter and marched it right into my supervisor’s office. I’m stepping out on faith…again.

I told the story of my friend’s passing not because I need your expressions of sympathy. I’m doing just fine and with time I will be even better. I wanted to share that story with you all so that you too can be motivated to live for today. The time is now to do whatever is in your heart. I’m not saying quit your jobs. I’m saying LIVE…however that looks to you…just do it. Do what you have to do as a responsible adult, but make sure you top that off with what you want to do as well.

On another note, I haven’t talked to you all in about 2 1/2 weeks so I’ll catch you guys up on some of what I have been doing. See below.

What I’ve Been Listening To: I decided to take a trip down memory lane and pull out Erykah Badu’s Mama’s Gun album. The album is celebrating its 20th birthday so what better way to pay homage to this thought-provoking art than by listening to it. The more I play the songs, the more I realize it was meant for me to revisit this album. It is speaking to the times I’m currently in. On one of her songs titled Time’s A Wastin , Erykah smoothly sings, “Keep on drifting…ain’t no telling where you’ll land.” That line adequately describes my current journey.

On the podcast tip, I’ve been revisiting old episodes from Side Hustle Pro. I love hearing the stories of women who are side hustlers-turned-moguls. Listening to where they started and how they got to where they are now is the motivation I need at this moment.

Who I’m Currently Inspired By: ANGEL ANDERSON - owner of THE SPICE SUITE in DC!!! You have to listen to her story (here) if you haven’t already heard of her!! This girl is goals!! I love her style and how she fuses fashion and food. She never set out to start her business. It just happened, and it is absolutely booming!! I’ve been following her on social media for a while and it so gratifying to see her growth. Home girl will rock the cutest pair of tennis shoes or a fabulous fur coat while cooking up a colorful dish using a special blend of spices that came from Morocco or India! Check her social media out here. You will not be disappointed!

What I’ve Been Working On: I’m currently working on my mindset. I want to control my thoughts as much as possible. Everything begins with a thought so therefore I’m creating abundance in my mind and letting it manifest into reality. Watch me work.

What I’ve Been Reading: I’m currently reading Party of One: The Loners' Manifesto by Anneli Rufus. It’s kind of slow so it’s taking me a while to get through it. I may put it down and come back to it. I got the news a week or so ago that one of my favorite authors, Sista Souljah, is coming out with the sequel to The Coldest Winter Ever (one of the best books in the world!!). I CANNOT WAIT! Life After Death will drop around March 2nd. YESSSSSS!!!!

Quote of the Month: What is possible and not possible is not your business. It’s nature business. Your business is just to strive for what you want. - Sadhguru

Let’s Live Y’all

- Samjah Iman

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

Outfit Details: Vintage Sweatshirt // Beret (old, similar one here) // Boots (kinda similar ones here)

It's the Little Things....Like a Subway Salad

Last week I had the honor of meeting a kind man who was recently released from prison after being locked up for 45 years (of course his sentence was too harsh for the crime he committed). He offered to share his story with me and a few other people, and I really couldn’t believe my ears as he laid out the awful details of his turbulent journey. “I believed I was going to die in prison. , he said. I lost most of my family while I was in there so when I was released, I had no choice but to sleep under the bridge for a while.” He went on to talk about how he eventually got back on his feet with the help of a local agency, and that he is blessed and optimistic that things will continue to get better for him. After he finished sharing his story, one of the listeners decided to ask the kind man what he wanted for Christmas. I just knew the kind man was going to say something like a bike, maybe a watch, a gift card, or something that would contribute to his new life outside of prison. Hell, if they asked me I would have surely asked for a vintage purse. But to my surprise, he asked for something that I would have never thought to ask for if I was in his position. “I’m extremely blessed, and I really don’t need anything. , he said. But if you would like to get me something….this may make you laugh…but….I’ve always wanted a Subway salad.” I felt humbled, sad, and extremely grateful all at the same time.

Just when you think you don’t have enough, someone somewhere else is wishing for the bare minimum. I sometimes find myself getting caught up in social programming which causes me to think that I need more….more money, more subscribers, more followers, more space, more clothes, more time, more this, more that. When in actuality, I have everything I need and then some.

“Needing nothing attracts everything.”

— Unknown

The conversation with the kind man reminded me to just be content. Peace comes from contentment, less stress comes from contentment, and more blessings come from contentment. As we go into this Thanksgiving holiday, let’s remember to appreciate what we already have. And if you find yourself being greedy or not satisfied with what’s going on in your life, remember those who would give anything to be in your shoes. Happy Thanksgiving my people!

Content,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Blouse (Zara, in store only) // Jeans (American Eagle) // Mules (Steve Madden no longer available)

Walking Like I'm Talking...

I’m in this weird/cool space where I’d rather be taking steps instead of talking about taking steps. I love to motivate people and be motivated, but at some point…we all have to trust in our abilities and walk it like we talk it. It’s beneficial to read all the self-help books, to repeat and write down affirmations, and to share and screenshot the inspirational memes from social media - but when are we going to actually show up? I’m not talking about the showing up that requires us to remain in our comfort zones. I’m referring to the showing up that forces us to go beyond our limits.

I proudly watched Kamala Harris stride across that stage last Saturday evening (to the sounds of Mary J. Blige!) as the US Vice President-elect. I was smiling from ear to ear as I sat in awe of the moment (black people, I am so damn proud of us!). I’ve been contemplating my next creative/career move for months now, and watching Kamala stand boldly before millions, donning a classic white pantsuit, got me amped. I didn’t get an “ah-ha” moment during her speech, and I’m still unclear about the exact direction I want to go in…but what her speech and presence did do was push me to want to take off. I’m going to just start walking towards my new season (whatever it shall be)…boldly and blindly. I have no idea where I will end up, I just know it’s time to move. It’s time to show my face and let fate do the rest. And the one thing I have a substantial amount of faith in is when I take the first step, the Universe will make way for the second.

Not living up to our full potential is a total disgrace to this current era we are in. We have more accessibility to the world and opportunities than we have ever had before; all we have to do is genuinely put ourselves out there and keep pushing. The other day I was scrolling on Instagram, and I saw someone promoting a book of Instagram captions that people can use under their pictures. AND IT WAS SELLING!!!!!!!!!!!!! I stared at the advertisement in amazement. If that didn’t push me to make some kind of move, I’m not sure what else will.

I think we (really talking to myself) have listened to enough podcasts, read enough “How To” books, and wrote down and posted enough affirmations. Of course it’s always good to soak up as much knowledge as you can, but now it’s time to implement that knowledge.

Let’s trust ourselves. Let’s walk the walk.

Strutting,

- Samjah Iman

In Case You Missed It - I took a little break from S&E to do some research (i.e. basically live life). Below is what I have been wearing while I was away. I included links to the looks that are still available. Talk to you all soon!

Outfit Details: Top (Zara - in store) // Boots

Outfit Details: Everything in this pic is old. :-/

Outfit Details: Dress (Zara - in store) // Boots

Outfit Details: Sweatshirt // Joggers (old) // Sneakers

I Am the Daughter Of...

A week or so ago I wasn’t feeling that black girl magic aura around me. My body was acting funny, my environment seemed cluttered, work was piling up, and my motivation was dwindling. I needed a boost. I needed to be reminded that I still had the power to move forward despite the stress that surrounded me. I eventually surrendered to my feelings and opened myself up to receive anything positive. And not too soon after I pleaded for any type of encouragement or motivation, I checked my email.

Months ago my good friend forwarded me an email which included an invitation to join a 21-day walking meditation series that highlighted black women and their accomplishments in history. This series was hosted by Girl Trek - an organization that advocates for the mental and physical health of black women. This is the same organization that hosted the beautiful live discussion on Facebook between Angela Davis and Nikki Giovanni. So of course I signed up for the series….it was my type of groove. However - I didn’t keep up with the series like I wanted to. So a week or so ago when I was pleading to get out of my funk, I opened my email and saw that Girl Trek was hosting another 21-day walking prayer meditation that highlighted more phenomenal, relatable black people. I joined it, and jumped on the call the next day. Long story short…my soul thanked me.

I got on the call, and the two ladies who created Girl Trek were having an informal conversation about the struggles we as black women face daily and how they’ve pushed through them. It felt like home. It was like being on a three-way call with my girls. They laughed, shed some tears, excitedly finished each other’s sentences, and then they had someone pray over everyone on the call. But the main thing they did that caught my attention was summons their ancestors for strength. They reached back and borrowed some of that tenacity our foremothers so graciously carried with them through life’s trials. I felt the power of that conjure. My spirit was touched. I began to feel alive again immediately.

Sometimes we not only have to remind ourselves who we are, but from whom we came. Those ladies on that call got me thinking about my lineage. I thought about how my mother overcame some of her biggest battles in life, how my grandmother (on my mother’s side) believed in pressing on no matter how dark the day looked, and how my great-grandmother (on my father’s side) took on the responsibility of toiling in the fields (after the death of her husband) in order to continue to feed all of their children. After hanging up that call and thinking about my predecessors, my chest was swollen with pride. I stood right where I was and said to myself, “I am the daughter of Pamela, who is the daughter of Gladys, who is the daughter of Georgia Ann, who is the daughter of Momma Aim.” Resilience runs through my blood. Love runs through my blood. Discipline runs through my blood. Perseverance runs through my blood. Royalty runs through my blood. Prayers were released into the atmosphere for me before I even set foot on this earth. I will not lose.

“No weapon formed against me shall prosper, ‘cause I’m walking with the prayers of my mother. ”

— India Arie

I encourage you all to reach back into your lineage for some strength. Know that we all come from some powerful sisters and brothers whether we know them or not. Remember the power we seek is already in us. All we have to do is tap into it.

Rooted in Royalty,

Pam’s Daughter

Outfit Details: Shirt // Pants (old)

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

If you would like to join the call, it’s not too late. It takes place every week day (not weekends) at 11 am CST. The information to call in is below. If you need some uplifting, please call…..you won’t regret it!

Dial: 1 (646) 876-9923 CODE: 734464325 (push pound after you enter the code and then the recording will ask you for another code or give you the option to push pound again - push pound again.)        

It's Not About the External Resources...

“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”

— Mark Twain

Typing the above quote brought the movie Hustle & Flow to mind.  I remember watching Ludacris and Terrence Howard recite this truism in unison and at the time, I didn’t think much of it. So I went back to that scene on YouTube, and I paid close attention to their conversation.  Terrence’s character (DJay) had been anxious to connect with Luda’s character’s (Skinny Black) because he was a huge fan of his artistry; particularly his first album. So in this scene, DJay was able to finally meet Skinny Black and hold a conversation with him. DJay praised Skinny Black’s first album and Skinny Black smiled in appreciation and made it known that he recorded that album in his mother’s laundry room. DJay then went on to say, “It’s not enough for a man to climb Mt. Everest. He gotta (sic) do that shit with the least amount of tools. One man and his skills.” Skinny Black then said, “Like the Samurai say (sic), the sword is only as powerful as its master.” Then DJay recited the Mark Twain quote and Skinny Black joined in. Whew child, after watching that exchange I felt like the doors of the church were open. I got all the proverbs I needed out of that small scene.

I’m assuming most of you have heard about the David and Goliath story from the bible. Well that whole Hustle & Flow scene piggybacks off that bible story in my opinion. It was hard to imagine David defeating Goliath because he didn’t have the fancy weapons, strength, or mass that Goliath possessed. But it turned out that David didn’t need any swords or big muscles to win the battle because what he was armed with was waaaaay more vicious. David had the internal artillery….he had the fight inside of him. Also, think about the story of Jesus feeding 5,000 people with just five loaves of bread and two fish. He didn’t make any excuses about the market running out of food or anything like that. He just showed up with what He had and made it happen. But some of us still won’t pursue our dream because we’re waiting on our bank accounts to reflect a certain number or our inventory to be overflowing (shaking my head).

I wrote all that to say that it’s time out for excuses. A lot of us are thinking we need a certain amount of social media followers, a nice office, an elaborate website, a high-tech camera, or a resourceful network to accomplish what we wish to accomplish. When in actuality, all you need is maybe a few small things and, most importantly, the determination to get things cracking. So many great things have been birthed from little to no resources. And when you think about it, resources actually play a small part in making anything happen. The true power to make things shake lies within the human.

So the next time you shy away from something because you don’t have enough of this or that or you back down from a challenge because you don’t have what you think you need to succeed, remember how David bust Goliath’s head with just a stone and a sling. Remember how Jesus fed multiple people with just a small amount of bread and fish.

External resources are good to have, but they don’t determine your outcome - the internal resources do. A lot can come from a little. Let’s not concentrate so much on the tangibles, let’s put our faith in the intangible.

Doing the most with the least,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Dopeaholics Hat // Romper // Vans

I got one more thing to show you before you leave this page!! When you get a second, check me out on the Introvert N The City podcast here. I’m discussing how it feels to be a black woman entrepreneur and some more things. I hope you enjoy it! Thanks for the support in advance! xoxo

Oh and screw the system/people who didn’t bring proper justice to Breonna Taylor’s case…UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

This Is My Life Homie, You Decide Yours...

Do you know how it feels to hold your stomach in for a long period of time?  It’s difficult and uncomfortable, right?  At any moment you feel like you could pop or explode.  You desire deeply to exhale and let it all hang out, but you’re afraid of the judgment that comes with someone seeing the real you.  So now you’re walking around the world, holding yourself in, pretending to be something you’re not, just so you can live up to an image of perfection that doesn’t exist.  Sounds stupid, huh?  It does…but it happens - and how it feels to hold your stomach in for long periods of time is how I feel when I’m living my life for someone else other than myself.  I feel like I can’t breathe properly…like at any minute, I will pop - and I did.       

Not too long ago I did a quick overview of my life and asked myself what percentage of my life was my idea, and what percentage of my life was other people’s ideas.  I didn’t like the results.  I thought about how many decisions I made because I thought it would look good to my family or because I thought it would coincide with the image everyone had of me in their heads.  I didn’t like the results of those thoughts either.  I also thought about how pissed I would be if I created a life that others thought I should create only to become resentful that I didn’t create the life I wanted to create.  After sitting with those thoughts for a second, I wrote this declaration in my journal…“to hell with who they think I am or what they think I should do, because the only person who has to pay for my decisions is me.  Therefore, my opinion should be the only one that counts.”

For as long as I can remember I’ve been combating and/or feeding into people’s perception of me.  I remember in high school I desperately wanted to play basketball as a freshman (and I did), but my brother’s then-girlfriend thought I looked more like a cheerleader so she persuaded me to try out for the squad.  I remember only dating a certain type of guy for a long time because those were the types of guys people thought I should be with.  I remember my college advisor trying her hardest to get me to join a sorority because I fit their aesthetic, but deep down I knew that wasn’t my vibe.  It’s hard to stay true to yourself in a world that doesn’t encourage and celebrate authenticity.  And even though staying true to yourself is not popular, it’s a major key to liberation.  Because if you let others dictate your life, you don’t truly own it.       

“If I didn’t define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people’s fantasies for me and eaten alive.”

— Audre Lorde

You know that feeling of relief you get when you finally unbutton some snug pants you’ve been wearing all day, or that feeling you get when you stop tensing up and you relax all your muscles then exhale with your entire body?  That’s the feeling I experienced when I finally stop holding the real me in.  And from that day forward I vowed not to create another façade in order to be accepted.  I also vowed to let it all hang out, no matter the judgment that followed.  Because being my true self feeds my soul, being someone I’m not takes away from it.

Life is short so I may as well please the person I’m with all the time….and that’s me.

My life - my way,

- Samjah Iman

P.S. - Hey my people! If you get a chance, check me out in this Hello Beautiful article. I’m honored!!! Talk to you all soon! xoxo  

Outfit Details: Graphic Tee (coming soon here) // Joggers (old Forever 21), Nike Sacai Tennis

Sometimes I Sits and Thinks and Sometimes I Just Sits...

When I was a kid, I remember being so frustrated with my mother because I felt like she didn’t sit down enough. There was always one more chore to do, one more meeting to be at, or one more errand to run. Big P (my mother) would be moving in and out the house doing 12 things at once while I observed her in exasperation. I would get so fed up from watching her jump from one thing to another that I would spring up from whatever I was doing and say with passion and concern, “Momma, why won’t you just sit down?!” My little soul was disturbed by her hastiness, and I didn’t understand why she couldn’t just drop everything and take a moment to chill……then I became an adult.

Here I am 30 years later wondering why I just can’t sit the hell down sometimes. It’s like I feel guilty when I have free time, and I find myself trying to fill it with something. Before I started writing this blog post, I was thinking of at least five things I needed to be doing at the moment. I called my mother and started rattling off the things I wanted to accomplish today but could not because of inclement weather. Then I said, “I just can’t sit here and do nothing.” To that statement, Big P replied with the following quote: Sometimes I sits and thinks and sometimes I just sits (some say this quote is from Winnie the Pooh, some say otherwise). She then reminded me of the times I used to ask her to just sit down which was basically her smooth way of saying, “Sam, take your own advice.”

Sitting and doing nothing is so underrated in today’s society, yet it’s such an essential thing to do. I’m the one who creates the goals and finish lines in my life yet and still I’m rushing like I’m on someone else’s clock. I sometimes get so caught up in societal standards that I find myself jumping through hoops and going super hard just to feel like I’m keeping up. Yes I have things to do and goals I want to see come to fruition, but I also have a spirit that needs tending to as well. If I don’t take the time to reflect and do absolutely nothing, I won’t be able to give my goals 100 percent and most importantly, I won’t be able to hear from God.

I’m challenging you all, as well as myself, to take some time this week to just sit and think or just sit. Let’s make sure we are giving ourselves the space to be productive as well as the space to be rejuvenated.

Happy sitting,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Cliff Multi Snake Sneakers and Fanny Pack // All-in-one White Romper

I No Longer Wear a Mask

I couldn’t stand my mask. Every chance I got to take it off, I was beyond relieved.  I felt free, unrestricted – like I could let it all hang out.  It was hard to express myself with a covering.  I was just going through the motions like the rest of the world; covering up for fear of being exposed or exposing.  When I had the mask
on, I often hoped someone could see the real me through my eyes.  Then maybe they would become intrigued enough to ask for more of me.  Sometimes, when no one was looking (usually in my own privacy or around family), I’d pull the mask down to show my own self a little more of me.  I missed the real me when the mask was on, and I needed to make sure I was still there. I was.  Behind that mask every bit of me was still intact – waiting to be freed.  I came alive when that mask was off.  I smiled harder, asked millions of questions, made funny faces, did goofy impressions.  I even frowned here and there.  Halfway through my sans-mask theatrics, I would begin to dread going back out into the real world because I knew I had to pull the mask back up in fear of judgment. 

One day I got bold.  I had enough of hiding.  I decided to show my entire face.  On that day I did not
give two damns about who saw me, who whispered about me, or even who stopped being my friend.  I wanted to feel at home in my soul.  I wanted to be who God intended me to be.  So, I did just that.  I ripped that mask off and came alive.  And you better believe I was all of Sam and then some.  I took the light I was given and flashed it every chance I got.  And from that day forth, I never put that mask on again.  It did not matter what the world was doing or what I would lose.  I was only concerned about feeding the joy inside of me and what I would gain from doing so. 

“Working pleasing me, cause I can’t please you, and that’s why I do what I do. ”

— Erykah Badu

If you haven’t caught on just yet, I’m not talking about the mask I wear to block Covid and protect others from my germs (I wear that mask faithfully, okay?!).  I’m talking about the mask I wore years before Covid.  The one I used to wear to disguise my true self so that others would feel comfortable.  I grew up surrounded by a culture that did not praise people for being who they were meant to be.  In my school environment, the more you flaunted your true self – the more your peers envied you. They loved for you to wear a mask because they wore one so naturally themselves.  Back then I did not know their hate had everything to do with them and nothing to do with me.  I was a typical teenager who was finding herself but at the same time wanting to make friends with everyone.  I quickly learned that one of those two things had to go.  Either I was going to shine the light God granted me or dim it to try and fit in.  After many trials and errors (even some current relapses here and there), I concluded that having only a select, few friends is enough; however, shinning my light and not wearing a mask is nonnegotiable.  Those two things are essential for me to breathe. 

“I was always too concerned about what everybody would think. But I can’t live for everybody. I got to live my life for me. ”

— India Arie

Every now and then I find myself reverting to that junior high girl who wanted everyone to like her.  Then I check myself.  I remember my purpose.  I recall that taking off my mask and being who I’m truly meant to be not only feeds my soul, it also gives that next girl, boy, woman, or man permission to pull that mask down and show us their full face.  Me sprinkling my spicy Sam dust on the world gives it that kick it needs.  Because if we all put the same flavor in this world, how dull would it be?  Give the world the real you, someone needs to see it to be the real them.        

Keep your Covid masks on my babies, take the invisible ones off though.

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Thou Shalt Tee // Shorts (Homemade) // Mules (sold out) // Hat

Photographer: Welch Inc Photography

I Quit - Part 4......The Journey Continues

Around this time three years ago I was reveling in the fact that I built up enough nerve to walk away from a job that I had nothing left to give to and that had nothing left to give to me. I don’t know if I ever went into detail on this blog about why I resigned from that 8-year position, but to make a long story short - my spirit was disturbed. Some of the people at the job made me uncomfortable. I wasn’t totally into what I was doing, and I carried the weight of the job on my shoulders all the time which caused me to be constantly stressed and out of alignment in my personal life.

I revisit this story about quitting my job yearly so that I can remind myself of my bravery and also see how far I’ve come. I’m in a much better space now than I was then, but my spirit is starting to slightly nudge me again…suggesting that I’ve gotten all I needed to get from the space I’m in, and it’s time to change course. There’s another move I have to make, and I’m not sure how or when I will do it. I’m not even sure what it is. I just feel in my spirit that it’s time for me to transition, and I’m going to obey that feeling.

A major lesson I learned as a result of walking away from that 8-year job three years ago is that one of the most unproductive things I can ever do in life is ignore what’s in my spirit. My spirit is my most sacred guide - it’s my inner God. And when I ignore it, the consequences are heavy. Peace is everything to me, and I will rearrange, erase, start over, open doors, close windows, sage, and do everything else to get it and keep it. I’m not sure where my journey is leading me y’all, but I will make this known - this time around, it won’t take me 8-years to surrender to what’s boiling inside of me. When my spirit says jump, I’ll be ready….and you guys will be the first to know where I land.

The rest is still unwritten…..

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: African Print Top // Gold Fringe Halo Necklace // Drawstring Shorts (similar pair, here)

I'm On a Podcast....CHECK ME OUT PLEAAASSSEEEE!

It was my first day of Film School at Howard University, and I was on edge. I was nervous about attending such a prestigious institute, nervous about meeting new people, and nervous about the shoes I chose to rock…were they stylish enough for this fashionably, progressive environment, should I have worn the boots instead? I had a million things going through my head and on top of that, my SUV was illegally parked outside of the building (parking spaces on campus were like black people at a Trump rally - few and far between). I was stressed. I wanted to drive back to Monroe, Louisiana and curl up under my momma, but I couldn’t afford the gas so I had to stay…..and I’m glad I did.

My HU experience afforded me the opportunity to not only learn some valuable things about my heritage as it relates to film, it also gave me the opportunity to meet the most incredibly, talented humans from around the world - one of those humans I’m referring to is Crispin Brooks. Crispin and I hit it off immediately when we met in script class. His Caribbean accent was so entertaining that I could listen to him talk all day. His bubbly energy enthralled me. We liked the same music, we loved to laugh, loved to talk about fashion, and we both shared the same nostalgia for everything 90’s. We became super cool. He often shared his dreams with our crew about returning to his island, Anguilla, after film school to create several media platforms to tell stories with an island flair - and he did just that.

After years of living our lives beyond HU we reconnected through social media, and he invited me to be on his podcast! I’m extremely honored that my HU brother thought my life journey was interesting enough to share with his audience. I had a great deal of fun doing this interview. I discussed my path to where I am now, and I talked about my views on fashion, life, and more. I would deeply appreciate it if my Style & Energy fam would listen to the podcast when y’all get the chance….oh and leave a comment on the podcast web-page if you’re digging it. Thanks a bunch!!!

Check the podcast out here….talk to y’all soon! Stay safe!

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Vintage Dress (found it in H&M for $10!)// White Pumps

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

Determined to Get the Waffle...

When I was a young kid, one of my favorite restaurants to dine at was the Waffle House (snobbish, right?). There was something about the smell of mop water mixed with fried bacon and constant chatter that appealed to my senses. I learned about the Waffle House through my father. The first time he took me there I was not only amazed by the atmosphere, I was also impressed by the fact that every worker knew his name. I had to get back to this place by any means necessary, and my father was the key. So over grits, runny eggs (his not mine), waffles, and overly-sweetened orange juice, I asked my father what the deal was on this restaurant, how everyone knew his name, and how could I be a part of this cult. He told me he comes to this particular Waffle House every Saturday around 7ish in the morning, and he’s been doing it for years. “For years?”….I thought to myself - “and I’m just now finding out about this slice of shabby heaven?” I wanted the waffle I was eating, the smells I was inhaling, and the conversations I was hearing around me to be a constant in my life. But 7ish in the morning on a Saturday was a stretch. So I kindly asked my father to consider changing his Saturday schedule to accommodate my late sleeping patterns. Of course he rejected that suggestion. He then told me if I wanted to go with him that bad, I’d have to be disciplined and wake up. I weighed my options. I then took another bite of my fluffy, golden-colored waffle…..and that was all she wrote. I was determined to do what I had to do to get that waffle every Saturday morning, and I did just that. I made it to the Waffle House that next Saturday, and a few more Saturdays after that. My determination outweighed any obstacles that posed as barriers…sleep (one of my favorite things to do in the world) couldn’t even hold me back from this goal.

A shift is currently happening in my life, and it’s time for me to make some moves so I’ve been searching my soul for motivation/discipline. As a result of soul-searching, this story came to my memory and reminded me of the tenacity and spunk that lives inside of me. I thought about how, even at a young age, I did what I had to do to get where I wanted to be. I thought about how hard it was to get up, but how sweet the victory (or the waffle) was because I did the hard part. So as I thought about this story, I reminded myself that when I want something REALLY bad, there’ s no stopping me. I set my eyes on the prize, make negotiations if need be, map out a route to get to the prize, then I put the pedal to the metal.

Sometimes we forget about who we are and what we’ve accomplished before. Every now and then we have to remind ourselves of the beast that lives within us. So the next time you stumble upon a roadblock or need direction for an endeavor, dig deep within yourself and pull some inspiration from a past victory. I bet you’ll get at least some of the motivation you need to pursue your next big or small thing. Now if y’all will excuse me, I have another waffle to go after.

Determined,

- Samjah Iman

Be safe y’all!

Outfit Details: Shoes // Top // Distressed Jeans (I purchased these jeans from Walmart and cut them up myself.)

Your Activism Doesn't Have to Look Like Mine - 10 WAYS TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE CAUSE

We are pissed off regarding the state of America, and rightfully so. Unfortunately this emotion is not a new one. It’s a very familiar feeling that the black community can’t seem to shake. It may lie dormant for a while, but sooner or later it’s agitated by some racist cop, bigoted politician, or economic/health disparity. But hey….I’m not here to preach, nor am I here to give you my views on the recent tragedies. Y’all already know where I stand when it comes to my community. The purpose of this blog post is not to reiterate the issues this country has. Its purpose is to remind and inform my readers that when it comes to this activism thing, there’s more than one way to skin a cat….and your way doesn’t have to look like everyone else’s.

Do not feel discouraged if you aren’t out there in the thick of things marching on the front lines with the rest of the world. Yes those rallies are critical, exhilarating, and prideful - and I ABSOLUTELY WANT THEM TO CONTINUE; however, there are more ways you can contribute to the cause if publicly protesting is not your thing….and it’s okay if it’s not your thing because activism is personal. It’s about doing what’s in your spirit, and not everyone has to do the exact same thing to support any movement. So if you’re wondering what you could do, aside from publicly protesting, to play your part in evoking change, check out my suggestions below.

10 WAYS TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE CAUSE

1. Support a black-owned business.

2. Have those tough conversations with your white friends, colleagues, or co-workers about the issues our community faces and what they can do to help. Ask them to use their privilege to advocate for change on our behalf.

3. VOTE. Register to Vote. Tell your people to Vote. Spread the word about Voting.

4. Attend community meetings, call, or email your local politicians and voice your concerns.

5. Post important and positive information regarding the black community on your social media pages.

6. Read! Educate yourself then spread the knowledge.

7. Hire qualified, black people if you own a business.

8. Donate to a black organization that uses their resources to fight systemic racism. (I just went to this link and donated a few dollars that will go towards getting protestors out of jail. It was quick and easy, and I didn’t have to leave my couch to do it.)

9. Go harder when it comes to your dreams.

10. Sign Petitions.

As my mother says, “just like there’s more than one way to get to New York, there’s more than one way to get to change.” We need all hands on deck, my people.

What’s your mode of transportation?

“If you can’t fly, then run.
If you can’t run, then walk.
If you can’t walk, then crawl.
by all means, keep moving.”

— Martin Luther King, Jr.

Doing My Part,

- Samjah Iman

Who Are You Asking?

I came into this world extremely sure of myself. As a kid, you couldn’t tell me I wasn’t a supernatural being and that skittles didn’t fuel my superpowers. Then life began to happen, and I allowed certain situations and people to continuously chip away at my self-assurance. When I finally woke up, I went into overdrive repairing what had been damaged within myself. And just when I thought my self-love was back to a healthy level, something or someone would come right along and challenge that belief. I then realized that the work I was doing was a constant effort. And while I couldn’t control some of the challenging circumstances that were sure to come, I could control two things - my reaction to the circumstances and my tribe (as I have been recently reminded). Keep reading my babies.

Y’all know I have to hear most things a few times (and in different ways) before they are embedded in my psyche. And on this past Mother’s Day weekend (shout out to all the mothers!), I got the “aha moment” I needed. My entire soul was fed while watching Angela Davis and Nikki Giovanni talk their talk, live, on Girl Trek’s Facebook page (and I caught Jill Scott and Erykah Badu’s live music exchange on Instagram…LAWD last weekend was one for the books!). I had my notebook on my lap, my pencil in my right hand, and my semi-full wine glass in my left. Class was in session, and I was soaking it all up! Every other second I was yelling “Go Girl!” at my cell phone screen. The entire discussion was fulfilling to say the least, but there was one statement from Nikki G that hit me right in my gut. One young, black lady joined the live conversation to ask the queens a question. I can’t remember her inquiry verbatim, but it was something to the tune of, “what do you two women do when people don’t see your potential or they don’t acknowledge your presence, or you don’t feel like you’re enough for certain groups?” After she asked the question, there was a split second of silence from everyone. Then Nikki G slightly leaned toward her webcam (or maybe I leaned in toward mine anticipating the answer…who knows) and said in her ‘I’m going to tell it like it is’ tone, “Who are these people you are asking? Who is your audience?” I almost threw my phone across the room. I stood up and had to take a few steps back. Nikki G asked the young lady again who these people were that she was seeking validation from. She then told the young lady (in so many words) that she not only needed to evaluate herself, she needed to evaluate her audience.

Yes we are responsible for the majority of the work we need to do on ourselves. But let’s not forget that the old adage “It takes a village to raise a child” not only applies to children, but adults as well. Just like it’s crucial to develop and market to your target audience for your business to grow, it’s also imperative that you develop and market to your target audience for your life to grow as well. I attribute a lot of my maturity to the hard work I put in daily to be a better me, but the people I choose to surround myself with have played an equally important part in shaping the person I am today. I can’t stress enough how surrounding yourself with people who are in favor of your mental, physical, and emotional well-being is instrumental to your growth. The people I’m referring to are not the ones who feed your ego or the ones who are only associated with you for their benefit. The people I’m referring to are the ones who sincerely want to see you sprout, who give you constructive criticism that is meant to propel you, and who encourage you along your journey. There have been plenty of times I’ve wanted the wrong audience to clap for me, to see my worth, to recognize my talents…..and that shit was draining and unproductive. Then when I began celebrating myself and submitting to my inner God….my audience changed for the better. Do y’all know that almost EVERY TIME I write a blog post I get an email saying someone unsubscribed? Years ago this would have caused me to question my abilities. But these days I’m aware that #1 - their unsubscribing does not validate or invalidate my purpose, and #2 - I’m only trying to perform for the audience who is in favor of this show. Everyone else can stand outside the venue.

Dwell where you are celebrated, properly corrected, and uplifted.

Check your vibe, then check your tribe.

Building a Dope Target Audience For My Life,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: McDowell’s Tee // Peplum Skirt (old) // White Pumps // Lip Stick (shade, Hot Mama)

This is How My Freedom Looks...

I finally watched the Harriet Tubman movie.  Everyone knows I’m a stickler when it comes to my sleep routine, and this movie kept me up waaaay past my bedtime - but I had no quarrels about it.  The movie was great.  I was fascinated by Harriet’s tenacity.  My watch alerted me that it was 15 minutes till 1:00 a.m., and I looked at it like it had its nerves.  I needed to see what Harriet was about to do, and I had no time for an electronic, time-telling hater reminding me that I was not on my regular sleep schedule. 

After the movie went off, I was bursting with pride.  I was motivated by girl Harriet.  I was inspired to do something brave.  As I lay in my bed decked out in a headscarf similar to the one Harriet rocked, I thought about what freedom meant to me. I understood deeply what freedom meant to slaves, but I hadn’t taken the moment to define what it looked like for me.  I went to bed that night without a clear picture of freedom as it related to my life.  I figured I’d discover the answer sooner or later, or I’d watch another movie or documentary that would give my brain something else to decipher - the story of my life.   

Weeks after the Harriet movie was totally out of my psyche, I was having a conversation with my mother on not being scared of certain outcomes.  I was explaining a situation I was faced with and how I wasn’t afraid to seek the truth because the results didn’t scare me.  My mother responded to my perspective and said, “that’s when you are free.”  She then said, “when you’re not afraid of loosing or failing - it frees you.”  The lightbulb went off in my head.  I have heard her say this before - I even wrote about it on this blog somewhere. But because I’m in the season of openness, the information hit a little different. Not being afraid to fail was my definition of freedom…..and I never thought of it as such. 

The conversation with my mother had my wheels turning.  I thought about the fact that I have almost never been afraid of the word no.  I’d ask any question I wanted to ask, prepared for the answer to not be in my favor.  I have never been afraid of starting over.  I’d leave any situation that wasn’t and isn’t serving me.  I have never been afraid of losing.  I’d take on any challenge not dwelling on the fact that the outcome may not be in my favor.  I have never been afraid of being without.  Although I love nice things, those things do not bind me to anyone or any situation. I have never been afraid of going against the grain.  The majority’s opinion doesn’t sway me, the God in my heart does.  Now…..have all the situations I’ve mentioned above been easy to conquer?  Hell no.  Am I still learning how to conquer them properly?  Damn right.  But the longer I keep living, the more I value my peace and autonomy.  And if anything or anyone threatens either of those two, I’m not afraid to make the necessary changes.   

“I don’t want to lose this good life, but I ain’t scared. ”

— Jill Scott

I’m discovering that my freedom is tied to my faith.  The more I exercise that faith, the stronger it becomes. And the stronger my faith becomes, the more confident I am in using it.  It’s contradicting to say I trust that things will be okay but then fear taking a big step or fear asking for something because the answer may be no.  Yes it’s uncomfortable to fail.  It’s uncomfortable to be rejected.  But once you discover that the failure/rejection/no didn’t kill you and doesn’t define your life, you begin to build courage.  And once you have that type of courage, nothing will hold you back….you’re free. 

I am not free because I’m living a good life. I am free because my life isn’t predicated on anyone else’s yes, no, validation, and/or presence.  I’m free because losing and failing do not restrict me.     

Give me liberty, or give me death,

- Samjah Iman

P.S. - I hope everyone is well during these times.  All of you all and this world are in my prayers.  Please stay hopeful.  Peace and Blessings!

Outfit Details:  Polka Dot Dress (Bohoo, sold out) // Vans

Trusting and Flowing....

Just a little quick message…

Outfits below!

Sorry guys, I have no details on these looks. They are all old styles I pulled from the back of my closet. Anyway…..enjoy the time you currently have. Keep trusting and flowing….

Later!

- Samjah Iman

Quarantine Confession...

I have a confession. I think I may have played a part in conjuring up this crisis we are currently in *nervously bites nails*. I know, I know….I apologize! You see…I’m working on this manifestation thing, and I’m still learning how to be precise with the universe. But just hear me out before you plot my demise, okay?

About a month ago I was over everything that drained my energy. Men were getting on my last nerve, and the world was too loud for my central system. So I cried out to the universe (God), Mary, Joseph, Peter, friends, strangers, the trees, my ancestors, and whoever would listen and asked for a break. I repeatedly said I needed a break from men and the world. I said it so much that it was all I thought about. The next thing I knew the world started shutting down, and everyone was forced to watch the pandemonium unfold behind their sanitized doors. At first I didn’t connect my wishes to what was going on, but a question from a friend made me realize that my plead had been heard.

In an effort to look at the bright side of our current crisis, my friend decided to ask her social media followers what positive things were happening as a result of being quarantined. She stated that she had finally met her neighbor after being in her house for quite some time. Another person stated that they were able to spend more time with their kid. I’m an introvert so it didn’t take me long to come up with several positive things that have transpired during my quarantine. Hell, I self-quarantine every chance I get when the world is normal. But I decided to think beyond the surface before I answered the question….and it came to me. This quarantine gave me the break I had been manifesting since January.

I’ve been vowing to slow down since 2019, but every time I turned around something or someone was in my face. Being that I get my energy from solitude and there was no solitude happening in my world, I was internally drowning. I didn’t have time to sort things out or to make the best decisions because I felt overwhelmed. Creating was pushed to the back burner and dating even became a burden. I wanted a timeout so bad that I confessed to a gentleman, while sitting across from him on a date, that I needed a break from him and any species that resembled him. I was meeting this person over here, going to several events, taking a picture in between, and responding to requests, emails, texts, calls, and inquiries on top of all those things. IT WAS ABSOLUTELY TOO MUCH! So slowly I began to clear my schedule, but I wasn’t doing the best job at it; therefore, I asked for help. And boy did I get it!!

Although the reason behind this quarantine truly sucks, I can’t help but express my sincere gratitude for it. Not only am I completing a lot of tasks, I’m also getting that much-needed time to sort through some thoughts and feelings. My mindset is shifting. I’m relearning some things. I’m having essential, detailed conversations and enjoying the process of gradual maturation. When this is all said and done, I think I’m going to have an interesting story to share. Stay tuned y’all.

Quarantining and Smiling,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Relationship Pending Tee // Flare Pants

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

Sisters, How Y'all Feel? Brothers, Y'all Alright?

Whew! This world has turned upside down in just a few shorts days, and I’m still trying to figure out when Black History month left the scene! Too much and not enough is happening right now. A lot of people are scared, confused, and anxious at the moment. I get it. That’s why I wanted to drop in real quick to see how everyone is holding up and to throw some good energy and inspiration your way. Let’s jump in below.

THE LATEST ON AS SAM’S WORLD TURNS….

1. What I’ve Been Monitoring - I’m keeping abreast of the crisis unfolding right before our eyes, but I’m making sure to feed my mind and spirit with positive things to counter all the scary news. I’ve been watching funny and inspirational YouTube videos, and I’m taking the time to catch up on some interesting shows on television. Right now the Hillary Clinton series on Hulu has my attention. It’s a documentation of her journey from childhood to now. It’s cool to see how she navigated the world under all the circumstances she has encountered. It’s also interesting to see her and Bill’s true life behind the political doors. I also just finished watching the latest season of Grown-ish. Yes it’s a college show, but the writing and story lines are actually compelling, relatable, and relevant. Oh and the fashion…..whoever the wardrobe stylist is for this show has my heart!! I get tons of style inspiration from all the characters!

2. What I’ve Been Reading - In the midst of all the chaos and the unknown, the one thing you can control is your mind. I’m forever working on training my thoughts and perspective. So when my girl recommended The Power Of Your Subconscious Mind by Joseph Murphy in our group chat, I jumped on purchasing the book. I just cracked it open, but from what I can tell it will definitely be beneficial to my journey. I recently created a reading nook in my home, so I’m excited to snuggle up with this book in that designated area.

3. What I’ve Been Listening To - A Written Testimony by Jay Electronica!!! I’ve not only been listening to this album, I’ve been studying it as well. That is what real hip hop does to me….it forces me to grow, discover, learn, and have in-depth conversations. Each time I listen to this album I catch something I didn’t hear the previous time. Jay Electronica has been in the rap game for a minute; yet, it took him SEVERAL years before he dropped his studio album…..and it was definitely worth the wait. The moral of this story to me is - everything in due time. Just make sure in the meantime, while you’re waiting for your moment, you’re picking up gems and exercising your mind and faith so that you can come correct with whatever you set out to do. Congrats Jay!!!!

4. What I’ve Been Wearing - It seems comfortable will be a reoccurring theme in my spring/summer wardrobe. Anything flowing, stretchy, or loose - bring it my way!!! Minimalism is my thing. The less I have to deal with, the more comfortable I am….and that goes for fashion and life.

5. What I’m Working On - Y’all, it’s so hard for me to stay out of this peanut head of mine!!!! I’m trying my best not to over analyze and deep dive into certain things. I sometimes can’t enjoy a simple moment without trying to discover the underlying cause of the moment lol. I’m working on this aspect of myself, but it’s hard to combat this issue being that I am a true Aquarius and that I was raised to think critically. The best practices that have remedied this habit for me have been participating in mindless activities. When I find myself overthinking, I tune into someone else’s life via a book or television. Or, I write it out. I’m bearing with myself though, because I know I’m a work in progress.

6. Quote For The Week - I had a conversation with my mother the other day about how difficult it is to be a righteous person (defined by my own terms) who tunes out the world and does what’s best for them. I won’t lie, I get tired of trying to be who I’m supposed to be in a world that doesn’t celebrate individuality and authenticity. Her reply was something that I already knew but had to hear again. She said, “Always try to do a difficult right (what’s in your spirit) instead of an easy wrong (the thing that isn’t in your spirit). Doing what’s right is like getting rid of the debt upfront, Doing the wrong thing is letting the debt collect over time.” We got to continue to pay it up front y’all.

“The hardest thing to do is to be true to yourself, especially when everybody is watching.”

— Dave Chappelle

Everyone, please remain vigilant and safe out here. This virus thing is serious business; however, when I rode my bike the other day through the empty streets of New Orleans, I couldn’t help but smile. Yes I’m concerned about those who have been directly and indirectly affected by this crisis, but at the same time I’m enjoying this downtime. It’s peaceful. The world seems so motionless right now, and sometimes that in itself is the cure to whatever has been disrupted….stillness.

Being still,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: T-shirt // Biker Shorts // Thigh-High Boots (My entire outfit came from Forever 21…yes even the boots!)

Photo Credit: 87 Photography 

What I'm No Longer Praying For in the Midst of Chaos…

I remember being trapped in a horrible job situation or at a low point in life and feverishly praying for things to get better quickly, and all I got in return was the same situation…day after day. Of course we don’t get everything we pray for, for a reason, but that doesn’t stop the disappointment or frustration that comes with the wait. When going through burdensome times, I would often ask religious people how to pray, and some would tell me I had to constantly ask God for what I wanted. Others would advise me to tell God what I desired once, and patiently wait for the results. I tried both ways…..and I still felt out of alignment with prayer.

I believe that everything happens in due time, but the prayer situation still boggles my mind from time to time. So in an effort to ease some of my confusion, I talked to my mother about my concerns. She expressed that she had been having the same questions herself. She told me that she could remember as a youngster praying every single night, pleading with God to end the Vietnam War. Her prayers were eventually answered, 10 YEARS LATER.

I am an extremely spiritual person, and I wholeheartedly believe in the power of prayer. I also believe God gave us the tools we need to bring forth what we desire; hence manifestation. But when someone is going through tough times, they don’t want to wait 10 years, 10 months, or even 10 minutes for their prayers to be answered. So after praying for some of the same things every single night without results, I felt the need to shift my prayer perspective. I’d been feeling this way for a while, and because I was ready to receive some guidance on this matter….it came.

During one of my usual Sunday morning rituals, I was searching for some teachings on YouTube when I ran across a TD Jakes’ sermon. I can’t remember what the entire sermon was about, but he definitely said some words that gave me the insight I was seeking. He spoke about Noah’s ark and how it rained for 40 days and 40 nights. He related that to the current struggles people go through and how they wait everyday to be released from them. And his advice for that was, “get comfortable and ride it out.” It was a “duh Sam!” moment for me. Jakes was basically saying, instead of constantly agonizing over your situation - just roll with it until it shifts. Of course it’s not that simple to do when you’re experiencing hardship, but it’s the best thing you can do at the moment because you’re in the storm for a reason. And if you endure, you will come out greater than you were before you went in. But you have to go through the process to get to the other side - no matter how long it takes. And if you abort the process too early, you may not reach your full potential. TD Jakes’ words reminded me of a line I read in The TAO of WU (thanks for the book recommendation Chris!). In that book, Rza (founding Wu-tang member) said that through experience he learned to trust chaos and confusion instead of judging it, fearing it, or trying to reach an immediate solution. He said that this was not only his secret to production, it’s also the secret to life. After listening to Jakes and reflecting on Rza’s words, everything began to make sense. Instead of trying to pray my way out of storms, I will accept what is, ride it out, and stay in alignment. Because the last thing I want to do is disrupt any incubation process that I am supposed to undergo in order to reach the next step of wisdom or blessings. I will no longer pray for storms to end, things to begin, or things to turn around. I will visualize the outcome I want, stay fixated on that vision, ask God to keep me in alignment, change my perspective, and bless me with the strength to hang in there until my shift comes. Remember, when you grapple with something it rebels, when you leave it alone it flows.

Both the beauty and scary part of life is that we don’t know what it will bring. However, what we do know is positive things will happen as will chaos. My prayer for you all and myself is that more positive shows up in our lives than chaos. And when the chaos comes, I pray that we trust it and view it as a breeding process necessary for our growth. May God grant us the endurance we need to ride these waves until calmer waters come.

Wave surfing,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Vintage Blazer // Jeans // Heels (old, similar here) // Purse (my mother’s closet)

Photography Credit: 87 Photography 

Come Back To The Middle

“Are you afraid of what CAN happen or what HAS happened?” That’s the question this young man slapped me in the face with as we sat in his living room and dissected my past relationships over veggie pizza and red wine. After he asked the question, I just sat there with my expression twisted as I looked in his eyes. I’m usually quick on the draw in situations such as this, but I was stumped. I took a sip of my wine to stall the conversation, then I asked him to repeat the question knowing damn well I heard it loud and clear. He obliged my request, and I still didn’t have an answer. After several seconds of silence coupled with immodest gulps of wine, I had an “aha” moment. I pried my wine glass away from my lips and finally responded with this, “actually….the question you just asked me made me realize that my fear doesn’t make sense. Because the past is over, and I have no idea what’s to come in the future. All I have is the middle…the moment. So what am I scared of?!”

I told you all last month that my most important lessons are resonating with me on a deeper level these days. And I don’t know if my chakras were working overtime or if the other elements in the room were kicking in - but when I was hit with the above-mentioned question, everything made perfect sense. The reason I was stumped and couldn’t answer the question was because I had no justification for the fear we were discussing. The past is over, and the future isn’t here yet. All I have is the time in between the past and the future, and that’s the middle. And in the moment, in the middle, I was good! I am good. The question I was asked reminded me of an Erykah Badu interview I read years ago. During this interview she was talking about renouncing fear. She stated that she noticed her anxiety and fear come when she is thinking about something that happened in the past or something that hasn’t even happened yet. But when she stays in the moment (or in the middle as I call it), she’s chill.

It’s so easy to be paralyzed by past occurrences and things we THINK will happen. Some people structure their lives according to those two instances. But when you stop and think about it, it’s absurd to base your now on a situation or situations that aren’t coming back and off an uncertain future. Every now and then I find myself getting caught up in what happened before or what can possibly happen going forward. Over 90% of my worries come from what history has shown me or what I have told myself might happen, when the truth of the matter is - none of those things are happening right now. And if either of them ever do, I’ll deal with it at that time.

I truly understand how one can rob him or herself of a moment or opportunity just by conjuring up past events or by letting their mind drift off into “what if” world. Of course it’s smart for me to be mindful and cautious, but I’m going to try my best not to let a past situation or “what if” situation that’s not even active ruin what currently is. The past is gone, and the future is uncertain….the middle is where it’s at. I’m staying there.

In the Middle,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: African Print Bijou Patchwork Crop Top // Skirt (Old) // Neon Pumps (specific color sold out, other colors here)

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

20 Hard Lessons I Had to Learn....

It’s my 38th year on earth. I’m blessed. Birthdays are becoming more of an intimate celebration for me. I don’t need the parties or all the hoopla. I just need a moment to first be grateful, then to reflect on how far I’ve come. It’s amazing how time does what it does regardless of what is happening around us. At one point in my life I thought my confusing teenage years would never end, now look at me - 38 years old and still trying to figure shit out.

There have been some waves to ride on this journey to 38. I’ve had some beautiful times that have left me in pure awe and bliss, and I’ve encountered some rough patches that had me side eyeing God like, “Really??” But through it all I’ve gained some valuable lessons that I hold close to me, and I’m on a quest for more wisdom.

I’d be remiss if I didn’t share the knowledge I’ve been gifted with over the years with you guys. So I looked through some of my journals, and pulled 20 hard lessons I learned throughout my journey. I refer to them as hard lessons because I’m still learning most of them. Now keep in mind that these lessons are tailored to my experiences. However, feel free to take away whatever you may need. Let’s jump into them below.

20 Hard Lessons I Had to Learn

1. Blaming other people for your mishaps and poor decisions is futile. Learn from past mistakes, forgive yourself, move the hell on, and be prepared to make some new mistakes. That’s how you gain wisdom, Sam.

2. Your intuition is the most valuable asset you possess. Use it, use it some more, and use it again. The more you use it, the stronger it becomes. The more you ignore it, the more faint it becomes.

3. Believe what he shows you, not what he says.

4. You’re always going to be learning. Gaining knowledge and wisdom never ceases. In fact, the more you know - the more confused you may be.

5. You only have a few friends…just a few. The older you get, the less you will have - and that’s okay.

6. Talk to your loved ones (especially your parents) as often as you can. They don’t stay around forever. You won’t either.

7. Always ask yourself if you are living for you or for someone else. Peer pressure is real and can distort even the most confident person’s view.

8. Save more money girl. Life is full a surprises and some of them cost a fortune.

9. Vulnerability is actually a sign of strength. Open your heart. It’s a courageous act.

10. This too shall pass.

11. Gather your thoughts before you speak in a heated discussion. It’s easier to do damage than to undo it.

12. Breathe…..just breathe. Take deep breaths. They really help.

13. Try to always operate in a state of gratefulness. It helps make life a little easier.

14. Deep connections energize you. Keep seeking them.

15. Your alone time is non-negotiable. It revitalizes you. It nurtures your spirit. Don’t ever let anyone infringe upon that…..no matter how cute they are lol.

16. Understand that other people are fighting battles too. Sometimes their decisions have nothing to do with you but everything to do with their experiences, situations, fears etc. Get over yourself.

17. Don’t be afraid to take chances. At the least you’ll have an interesting story to tell.

18. Stop looking, and you’ll find it.

19. You are going to be pissed off at yourself in the future if you look back and see that you dimmed your light. To avoid a mid-life crisis, be who you are fully meant to be right now.

20. Listen more than you talk. Sometimes if you let the other person do the talking, you’ll learn everything you need to know without having to seek.

Thank you guys for sharing this journey with me. I appreciate you all and this platform to express my thoughts and feelings more than you know! My heart is full.

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Joggers // Sweatshirt (Similar color)// Pumps

Photo Credit: Corey Anthony