Life Update: I'm the One Who Needs the Work.

I’ve been over here practicing yoga, drinking water, sleeping, and appropriately feeding my mind, body, and spirit. While I’m enjoying this chill phase of my life, I’m also learning more about me. And one valuable lesson that keeps coming back to me is the lesson of self. Basically, it’s not them, it’s me. After a few failed attempts at trying to alter the world and the people in it, I came to the conclusion that it would be better for my health if I just concentrate on the only person I could control - me. Before I came to this conclusion, I found myself falling back into the rut of trying to get people to see things differently, to prove how right I was and how wrong the other person was, to try and make people be considerate, nice, etc. I was running myself absolutely crazy while people were seemingly so peaceful with being idiots :-). I knew something was off. I was making life waaaaay harder than it had to be, and I had to realign quick.

Of course, as the universe will have it, the teacher appears when the student is ready. I went to my YouTube app one day to find the perfect meditation soundtrack, and I came across the Tao Te Ching. I listened intently. One thing the narrator said that caught my attention was this…Mastering others requires force. Mastering the self needs strength. - The Tao

Trying to stop a dog from being a dog is senseless. You can’t change the ways of the dog, but you can change if or how you deal with those ways. This is the journey I’m on. I’m no longer pointing the finger outward. I’m pointing it inward. My concentration has been on discovering and tending to my triggers. I now look at every encounter, every situation, and every relationship as a learning experience - a chance for me to see how much I’ve grown and how much work I still have to do. I wake up everyday and make a vow (that I break from time to time lol) to only control what I can control, and let the rest be. Operating this way has afforded me more peace. I’m seeing the fruits of my labor which makes me even more excited to continue on this path. I’m not sure where this current journey will lead me, but I have a feeling that because of this new way of living, blessings will ensue. I’ll keep you all posted.

Outfit Details: Top and Skirt // Heels (old - Steve Madden)

I took a blog sabbatical, but I was still putting looks together! In case you’re not following me on Instagram, below are some of the styles you’ve missed!

Outfit Details: Dress // Boots (old)

Outfit Details: Blazer (old) // Biker Shorts // Crop Top // Tennis (old)

Outfit Details: Crop Top // Joggers // Boots

Outfit Details: Jogger Set // Hat

Outfit Details: T-shirt // Jeans (Target in-store) // Heels

Outfit Details: Jogger Set

Outfit Details: Jacket (Custom made by Aud Culture) // Leggings // Boots

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

Being Selfish is My Mode of Operation From Now On....

I just left the hospital yesterday. I had a minor procedure done (lady stuff). I’m healing and resting. Although the circumstances weren’t favorable, I found the blessing in the storm. I know for sure that one of the purposes of these circumstances was for me to get some much needed rest. I’m currently being selfish, and it feels so good. For the first time in a while, my mind and body are still. And it only took me having to go to the hospital for that to happen. Wow.

I’ve been saying for the last few months that I needed some rest, but I wasn’t following through. After I resigned from my job in December, I wanted to hit the ground running with my freelance career. My mind was steady racing everyday about everything I needed to do. I feared that if I gave myself a break, I would miss a lucrative opportunity. I was doing my yoga in the morning and all the meditative stuff, but sometimes I would even rush that to get to my work. Subconsciously, I began to carry that familiar guilt on my shoulders that almost every black woman bears - the guilt that we must be superwoman to every problem and everyone except our needs and ourselves. I don’t know how I began to feed into this notion because I try my best not to subscribe to that “black women should be strong all the time and keep going no matter what” crap, but there I was…lying in the hospital bed (enjoying the silence and hospitality might I add) and thinking, “Yup Sam, God had to sit you down so that you can understand that it’s time for you to become a little more selfish.” I heard God, and I’m taking heed.

“Taking care of yourself is taking care of others.” My 96-year-old grandmother uttered those words to me out of the blue this past summer while I was sitting on her plastic-covered couch, squinting at her 32-inch television. I now feel those words deep in my soul. I love to work and will continue to grind…but at my own pace. Wealth to me is good health, a flexible schedule, and peace. I’m giving myself permission to ignore calls and delay responses to emails and messages when I need to. I will extend myself even more grace and will allow myself to take whatever I need to off my plate to remain sane. I will feel the strength and confidence (instead of weakness) in saying “I won’t be able to do that right now…or never.” I will have however many lazy moments I need. I will take the time to sit and read a book without thinking about what else needs to be done. I will give myself a moment (if not more) out of each day to be selfish, and I will not beat myself up about it. This is my creed, and I will refer back to this post when I need to. Peace and blessings, y’all.

Selfishly,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Vintage Leather Coat // Heels (Steve Madden, old) // Skirt (Free People, old) // Top (Zara, old) // Sunglasses (vintage hand-me-downs)

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

I Am the Daughter Of...

A week or so ago I wasn’t feeling that black girl magic aura around me. My body was acting funny, my environment seemed cluttered, work was piling up, and my motivation was dwindling. I needed a boost. I needed to be reminded that I still had the power to move forward despite the stress that surrounded me. I eventually surrendered to my feelings and opened myself up to receive anything positive. And not too soon after I pleaded for any type of encouragement or motivation, I checked my email.

Months ago my good friend forwarded me an email which included an invitation to join a 21-day walking meditation series that highlighted black women and their accomplishments in history. This series was hosted by Girl Trek - an organization that advocates for the mental and physical health of black women. This is the same organization that hosted the beautiful live discussion on Facebook between Angela Davis and Nikki Giovanni. So of course I signed up for the series….it was my type of groove. However - I didn’t keep up with the series like I wanted to. So a week or so ago when I was pleading to get out of my funk, I opened my email and saw that Girl Trek was hosting another 21-day walking prayer meditation that highlighted more phenomenal, relatable black people. I joined it, and jumped on the call the next day. Long story short…my soul thanked me.

I got on the call, and the two ladies who created Girl Trek were having an informal conversation about the struggles we as black women face daily and how they’ve pushed through them. It felt like home. It was like being on a three-way call with my girls. They laughed, shed some tears, excitedly finished each other’s sentences, and then they had someone pray over everyone on the call. But the main thing they did that caught my attention was summons their ancestors for strength. They reached back and borrowed some of that tenacity our foremothers so graciously carried with them through life’s trials. I felt the power of that conjure. My spirit was touched. I began to feel alive again immediately.

Sometimes we not only have to remind ourselves who we are, but from whom we came. Those ladies on that call got me thinking about my lineage. I thought about how my mother overcame some of her biggest battles in life, how my grandmother (on my mother’s side) believed in pressing on no matter how dark the day looked, and how my great-grandmother (on my father’s side) took on the responsibility of toiling in the fields (after the death of her husband) in order to continue to feed all of their children. After hanging up that call and thinking about my predecessors, my chest was swollen with pride. I stood right where I was and said to myself, “I am the daughter of Pamela, who is the daughter of Gladys, who is the daughter of Georgia Ann, who is the daughter of Momma Aim.” Resilience runs through my blood. Love runs through my blood. Discipline runs through my blood. Perseverance runs through my blood. Royalty runs through my blood. Prayers were released into the atmosphere for me before I even set foot on this earth. I will not lose.

“No weapon formed against me shall prosper, ‘cause I’m walking with the prayers of my mother. ”

— India Arie

I encourage you all to reach back into your lineage for some strength. Know that we all come from some powerful sisters and brothers whether we know them or not. Remember the power we seek is already in us. All we have to do is tap into it.

Rooted in Royalty,

Pam’s Daughter

Outfit Details: Shirt // Pants (old)

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

If you would like to join the call, it’s not too late. It takes place every week day (not weekends) at 11 am CST. The information to call in is below. If you need some uplifting, please call…..you won’t regret it!

Dial: 1 (646) 876-9923 CODE: 734464325 (push pound after you enter the code and then the recording will ask you for another code or give you the option to push pound again - push pound again.)        

I No Longer Wear a Mask

I couldn’t stand my mask. Every chance I got to take it off, I was beyond relieved.  I felt free, unrestricted – like I could let it all hang out.  It was hard to express myself with a covering.  I was just going through the motions like the rest of the world; covering up for fear of being exposed or exposing.  When I had the mask
on, I often hoped someone could see the real me through my eyes.  Then maybe they would become intrigued enough to ask for more of me.  Sometimes, when no one was looking (usually in my own privacy or around family), I’d pull the mask down to show my own self a little more of me.  I missed the real me when the mask was on, and I needed to make sure I was still there. I was.  Behind that mask every bit of me was still intact – waiting to be freed.  I came alive when that mask was off.  I smiled harder, asked millions of questions, made funny faces, did goofy impressions.  I even frowned here and there.  Halfway through my sans-mask theatrics, I would begin to dread going back out into the real world because I knew I had to pull the mask back up in fear of judgment. 

One day I got bold.  I had enough of hiding.  I decided to show my entire face.  On that day I did not
give two damns about who saw me, who whispered about me, or even who stopped being my friend.  I wanted to feel at home in my soul.  I wanted to be who God intended me to be.  So, I did just that.  I ripped that mask off and came alive.  And you better believe I was all of Sam and then some.  I took the light I was given and flashed it every chance I got.  And from that day forth, I never put that mask on again.  It did not matter what the world was doing or what I would lose.  I was only concerned about feeding the joy inside of me and what I would gain from doing so. 

“Working pleasing me, cause I can’t please you, and that’s why I do what I do. ”

— Erykah Badu

If you haven’t caught on just yet, I’m not talking about the mask I wear to block Covid and protect others from my germs (I wear that mask faithfully, okay?!).  I’m talking about the mask I wore years before Covid.  The one I used to wear to disguise my true self so that others would feel comfortable.  I grew up surrounded by a culture that did not praise people for being who they were meant to be.  In my school environment, the more you flaunted your true self – the more your peers envied you. They loved for you to wear a mask because they wore one so naturally themselves.  Back then I did not know their hate had everything to do with them and nothing to do with me.  I was a typical teenager who was finding herself but at the same time wanting to make friends with everyone.  I quickly learned that one of those two things had to go.  Either I was going to shine the light God granted me or dim it to try and fit in.  After many trials and errors (even some current relapses here and there), I concluded that having only a select, few friends is enough; however, shinning my light and not wearing a mask is nonnegotiable.  Those two things are essential for me to breathe. 

“I was always too concerned about what everybody would think. But I can’t live for everybody. I got to live my life for me. ”

— India Arie

Every now and then I find myself reverting to that junior high girl who wanted everyone to like her.  Then I check myself.  I remember my purpose.  I recall that taking off my mask and being who I’m truly meant to be not only feeds my soul, it also gives that next girl, boy, woman, or man permission to pull that mask down and show us their full face.  Me sprinkling my spicy Sam dust on the world gives it that kick it needs.  Because if we all put the same flavor in this world, how dull would it be?  Give the world the real you, someone needs to see it to be the real them.        

Keep your Covid masks on my babies, take the invisible ones off though.

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Thou Shalt Tee // Shorts (Homemade) // Mules (sold out) // Hat

Photographer: Welch Inc Photography

Rewiring My Mind

I write these blog posts that document my journey to becoming a better me, but writing is only half the battle. I still have to put in major work outside of these blogs because, simply put, life is real. I’ve come far on my journey, and I’m very proud of that fact. Yet in still, I have to put in work daily to keep up what I’ve achieved thus far. You wouldn’t stop exercising after you’ve reached your ideal weight, huh? I sure hope not…or else you’ll eventually go back to square one….and that’s the point many people don’t emphasize - the work to maintain your progress.

For instance, we are often bombarded with messages about the importance of shifting our mindsets and thinking positive. But rarely do we see messages that tell us how much work it is to do those things. Experts estimate that we have about 60,000-80,000 thoughts per day. Now take a second and think about the work you have to put in to tame all of those thoughts that run rapidly through your head. With that many thoughts shifting in and out of our brains, it’s so easy to let our minds get off track here and there. And because it’s so easy to go back to our old default settings, every now and then we have to do some rewiring.

We get so caught up in and bogged down by our everyday lives that sometimes we forget to be intentional with our thoughts. When you’re concentrating on paying bills, feeding people, meeting deadlines, fighting traffic, and listening to other people’s perceptions - controlling your thoughts may fall by the wayside at times. I know my efforts to control my thoughts definitely plummeted these past couple of weeks. I was so caught up in what was going on in the world because I messed around and saw some crazy stuff on the news (which I try not to watch often), so of course my mind began to wonder….”What if this happens? What if I never? What if it’s not meant? What if that and what if this?” Next thing you know, stress and anxiety were threatening my peace. Fast forward a few days later, the universe came to my aid and, out of the blue, placed me and a friend of mine in the same space (everything happens for a reason). We ate lunch and talked about our vibrations and how powerful the mind is and things that happen as a result of us not controlling our thoughts and the energy around us…..and then it dawned on me - my positive vibrations went awry and my mind reverted back to where I worked so hard to bring it from because I allowed the negative things I witnessed to occupy my mind longer than they needed to. The wrong thoughts began to consume my mind, and I had to put in the work to get back on the right path mentally. I had to dig deeper in my yoga class, continuously listen to uplifting music (no trap music for a minute), fall asleep with positive podcasts playing in my ear, read affirming words religiously, and have positive conversations with people who were on the vibrations I was trying to get back to. And you better believe my spirits were lifted again almost immediately.

Just like every other thing in our life that needs maintaining, our mind is no exception. We just can’t declare we want to think differently then sit and watch it happen. Or we can’t just work on our minds once and be done. It takes a lot of effort, faith, and daily work to train our minds to think how we want them to think. We’re going to slip at times, and we’re going to have to do some rewiring to rectify those slips….but as long as we understand it’s a constant practice, we are definitely on the right path….mentally.

Changing my mindset…..every second,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Yah is Dope Yoga shorts, Crop Top, & Fanny Pack // Boots

Oh and don’t forget to cop your SOMEONE’S DAUGHTER t-shirt before they are all gone!! I only have 7 left! Get yours here!

Picture Credit: Welch, Inc Photography

Can You Afford It....Emotionally?

Overspending is not the most responsible thing to do. And you might as well call me careless because I’ve done it SEVERAL times. There have been instances where I knew better than to spend my last on a pair of boots, but I did it anyway - and a scant savings and Raisin Bran cereal dinners were my consequences. I’ve been in the overspending mode quite a few times and each time I did it, I had some major bouncing back to do. Nowadays, I try to be more responsible with my coins. Before I purchase most things, I ask myself - do I need it?…and second and most importantly - can I afford it? By asking myself these simple questions, I’m prompted to think before I impulsively act - and as a result, I’ve saved myself a few dollars here and there. Since this simple technique works so well with my money, I decided to try it with my emotions as well. And let me tell you this….it hasn’t been easy, BUT it has saved me from a few disappointments and turmoil along the way.

Through conversation with a friend some time ago, I’ve come to realize that our emotions always pay a price for most of the choices we make. It’s perplexing how some of us are somewhat conscious when it comes to our finances, but not as conscious when it comes to our emotional bank. We check our bank accounts often to make sure we are good financially….but rarely do we check in on our emotions for the same reason. We jump into cyclonic circumstances, choose shaky situations, or allow frivolous things to happen that we know will possibly have an impact on our mental peace and emotional well-being. Some of us are adamant about saving money and getting our bank account to a certain status, yet our emotions are almost bankrupt.

There was a time when I would allow myself to choose or go back to certain relationships/situations that I knew drained me instead of fueled me. My emotional bank was already low (because I hadn’t healed properly), and accepting said relationships or situations depleted what little emotional currency I had left. I knew choosing those relationships/situations would be emotionally taxing and therefore have me in a slump that would be hard to come out of - but I jumped in anyway….well, because… (as I said before), I was an overspender. After countless times of blaming the other person, bumping my head, suffering from hurt feelings, and a fair share of self-sabotage, I now watch my emotions like I watch my money. When I’m presented with a situation these days that requires me to open up and give all of me, I make sure to ask myself, “Sam, how much is this going to cost you emotionally, and can you afford it?” I get real with myself. I weigh the consequences. I check my emotional bank. And if the situation is worth my while, AND I have a substantial amount of emotional currency saved up - I may jump out there. But…if my bank account is low, and I’m on my last - I pass it up.

Although I’m still evolving and learning daily, I can honestly affirm that a lot of my maturity and growth is attributed to me being a good steward over the emotional situations I get involved in. Of course every situation isn’t avoidable, but by building up my emotional bank - I’m able to handle the unforeseen a little better than I would if my emotional bank was empty. Have you ever seen someone fly off the handle easily or cry hysterically over every little thing that happens to them? It’s probably because they have been emotionally overspending for a while now - and as a result, their emotional bank account is in the red.

There are too many instances in the past where I piled one dramatic situation on top of another which resulted in my emotional bank running low. So now I try to keep my emotional bank account as plentiful as possible. And since it feels so good to have extra emotional currency just sitting in the bank, I don’t plan on ever going in the red again. But if for some reason I do, I’ll make sure to stack my emotional coins back up before I purchase the next adventure.

P.S. - Soon I’ll share with you all the ways I stock up on my emotional currency in hopes of helping someone.

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

Leveling Up is Expensive

I remember when I was presented as a debutante during my senior year of high school. The theme my mother came up with for my tea was “Ending to Begin Again.” Preparing for my debut, my mother and I sat and stuffed each invitation to my soirée in its proper envelope. Every time I picked up an invitation, I read the bold theme written above my picture….Ending to Begin Again, Ending to Begin Again. The theme kind of confused me because in my head graduating high school was a big thing, and now that I was close to accomplishing it - I figured the rest of my life as an adult would be a breeze. In an attempt to undo my confusion, I asked my mother what her motive was behind that theme. My mother - eager to take advantage of a teachable moment - grinned, looked me dead in my face, and said……“you’re conquering one milestone only to start another, hun.”

Since then, I’ve been continuously learning that the more I accomplish, the more I have to do. There is really no ceiling to life if you want the most out of it. I often hear people saying how easier and more enjoyable life will be if they could just get the job they want, the perfect mate, the cozy house, the luxurious car, more customers, etc. And these things may definitely enhance your life, but with all of those things come more work. Just got that degree you’ve been working hard for? Congrats! But now you have to put it to work. Loving that new house you’re in? Cool! But don’t forget to get it sprayed for bugs, mow the lawn, change the smoke detectors, and pay the taxes. New boo, huh? Lovely! It’s now time to learn how to communicate effectively with that person, learn how to share your space, and come up with a flow that benefits the both of you.

Conquering goals motivates us to strive hard each and everyday. But keep in mind that going to the next level is expensive. It requires more energy, more wisdom, more time, more spiritual alignment, etc. Don’t get caught up in the notion that once you’ve accomplished a certain goal, it’s smooth sailing for the rest of the ride. In The Path Made Clear by Oprah Winfrey, she discusses how even after 25 years on her popular television show, success still didn’t come easy - in fact, it became more challenging. When referencing a commencement speech she was invited to make at Harvard University (which totally intimidated her), Oprah wrote, “it seemed, the higher I hiked, the trickier the terrain.” Take it from our Auntie O, if you desire to continuously move up in life, you have to pay the cost that comes with it.

To sum up this post, think about the bible verse that says, “to whom much is given, much is required.” And if you’re a spiritual gangsta, take into consideration this truism from the great, late Notorious BIG - “Mo money, Mo Problems.”

Continue to level up, but always be mindful of the simple fact that you’re always Ending to Begin Again.

Paying the cost,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Lace Top (tobi.com, sold out) // Shorts (Wrangler jeans I cut up from Wal-Mart) // Pink Blazer (borrowed it from my girl while I was shooting lol) // Nude Heels

Fear Won't Govern My Life

This past week I had a minor scare at my home. I love natural light, and I spring up each morning looking forward to opening my curtains, allowing the sunlight to occupy my living area. Well on one particular day, a deranged looking, Peeping Tom walked by and decided to stop and press his head against my window to get a closer look at the happenings in the Queendom. After discovering me staring right back him, he quickly walked off; seemingly embarrassed. But not too embarrass to return and do it again…..and again! When I saw him lingering in front of my window for the third time, I quickly sounded my alarm to scare him. I then called my parents to let them know the deal. My father instructed me to close the curtains, cock my gun, and send the signal when I’m ready for him to come my way. For the next few days after that I was kind of spooked. I was on high alert. I could already picture myself going to war to defend my territory and ending up on the 5 o’clock news (my mind does the absolute most at times). The fear of what could possibly happen began to paralyze me. I didn’t want to linger outside too long, and I was hesitant about opening my curtains - afraid of what would be lurking on the other side of the window.

My father called to check on me each day and when he did, I told him that I was okay but I didn’t want to open my curtains or be outside too long which was unfortunate because I absolutely loved my neighborhood. Before I could finish going on and on about how startled I still was, he stop me dead in the middle of my sentence and said, “naw Sam….that’s what you don’t need to do. Don’t give into fear or allow your life or routine to be interrupted because of this….live normally.” As soon as he said those words I felt the gangsta in me permeate my pores. I stood up from my couch with confidence and said, “You’re right Daddy! I’m not about to let my fear, this incident, or any other traumatizing situation that has happened in my life, cripple me. I will go about life normally and be prepared for whatever comes my way.” From then on, I relaxed. Yes I’m still acutely aware of my surroundings, the gun is still loaded, the police are on speed dial, and I don’t open my curtains as wide as I did before (small steps), but I’m carrying on with my regular day to day activities like I ordinarily would. I step outside daily with a calmness as if a ruthless army walks before me (and it does….my ancestors are a beast!). It seems as soon as I made the decision to face my fear head on….something incredible happened - my fear vanished. And ya’ll, I did all that stressing and haven’t seen that man since lol.

I thought about how many times I’ve rearranged my routine or life in the past to avoid something or because I feared the outcome. Not anymore. What I’m constantly learning is that most of the fears I’ve conjured up in my head haven’t and probably won’t come to pass.

“Whatever you fear the most has no power - it is the fear that has the power. ”

— Oprah

I remember my mother once saying to me, “When you’re not afraid to fail, it frees you.”, she was on point with that one. Because all fear does is immobilizes us and keeps us from living the fullest life we can possibly live.

Whatever fear is holding you back from doing whatever it is you need to do, face it. Square up with that fear, show your gangsta, and don’t let it have dominion over your life - and in most cases, you’ll find that you’re way more powerful than any fear you’ve ever had.

Picture Credit: Jay Marie Visuals

Outfit Details: Top // Pants (old) // Heels (old similar pair, here)

All You Have to do is Just Be

As soon as you log into your email each morning or on your social media accounts, messages like get money, hustle hard, stay on the grind, hurry up and succeed, are pushed in your face.  I totally get those messages, am sometimes motivated by those messages, and have even emailed/posted those types of messages in the past as well.  However, I woke up the other morning and said that on that day (and the days to come) I will just be.  I won't be hard on myself, I won't try to overachieve, I won't let the world or internet rush me or tell me what success should look like. I will just simply just be present, do the work my way, and let the chips fall where they may. 

Sometimes we need to take all of that stress off of our shoulders from the world, get a clear picture in our heads of how success looks to us, and just be.  Be in the moment, be in spirit, be appreciative, be reflective, be content, be patient and everything will come together. Let the pressure of succeeding and the world go sometimes.  This is your own race, no one else's.  Just be.   

Outfit Details: T-shirt // Neon Pumps

Just Be Sure to Have Fun

I never cease to amaze myself.  Not because I'm some supernatural human being who gets it right all the time, but because I am always jumping out there and doing stuff that I'd never thought I'd do.  So last week, I acted in a pilot for a summer love series.  I'm laughing right now as I type this because I still can't believe I did it.  Acting has never been on my goal list, but when the opportunity came, I sized it up, contemplated, consulted wise counsel, then said f**k it...why not?.  

When I got the email from the director of the film, my first reaction was, "nah, that's not me....I'm good."  So I respectfully decline.  But the director (getshotbyagirl) was persistent.  So I looked at her previous work and was impressed.  I contacted my advisory board (my people lol), and they all said go for it.  One of my board members particularly said, "just do your best and have fun."  And I took that simple advice to heart.  I showed up to the set all chipper and unprepared with no lines memorized and absolutely no knowledge about acting whatsoever.  When my turn came, I channeled my inner Angela Bassett, gave my all, and made sure I enjoyed every moment of it - even the bloopers.  Almost six hours and 900 acting attempts later, the film was a wrap....and I had once again tried faith and won.   

I went home that night (or morning) feeling good not because I gave an Oscar-worthy performance, but because I enjoyed myself.  Going into new territory always makes me a little uneasy and this time was no different.  But what really helped me conquer this experience was my attitude about just having fun.  Life is but a blink of an eye, why not enjoy ourselves as much as possible while we live it?  

I'm not sure when the series will be released, and I'm actually not tripping either.  I'm just enjoying the different roads life is placing in my pathway.  Acting surely wasn't a road I asked for, and I have no idea where it will lead.  My goal is just to trust the One who does and have fun while doing so.  

Currently smelling the roses,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Black Dress // Heels (Steve Madden, very old lol)

Don't Blame Them, Check Your Self-Love Meter + Just Fab/ShoeDazzle Summit

My girl Marsha from Introvert N The City came to Nola for a conference last week, and we had the chance to catch up and kick it.  Riding through the bumpy streets of the Crescent City while eating snowballs, we discussed our past and other things we've encountered during our years of living.  We got on the subject of our exes, and Marsh made this statement, “All of the things I put up with while dating my ex shows how much I DIDN’T love myself.”  The choir started signing because church was about to commence.  I praised Marsha for her self-awareness and for making that mature declaration.  I thought about how we often refer to the people who mistreated us in our past as “no good,” “trifling,” “disrespectful,” etc. and they may very well be all those things, but what we don’t talk about is the lack of love we had for ourselves which, in turn, allowed those people to operate in our space.  

I’m totally guilty of not valuing myself enough at times in the past.  I look back at certain situations and I simply ask myself, “Sam, how in the hell did you allow yourself to go through that??”  I know now that some of it was a lack of self-love, and as the saying goes - when you know better, you do better. 

Self-love is not only treating yourself with the utmost respect, it’s also not allowing yourself (when possible) to deal with anyone or anything that doesn’t.  Self-love is staying away from negative people, exercising your mind and body, spending time alone, spending time with loved ones, eating the right things, meditating, detoxing, laughing, being kind to yourself, being kind to others, being in healthy relationships, etc. 

Before we blame someone or something for mishaps that have happened in our adult lives, let's all check our self-love meter and make sure it's operating on high.  

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Bardot Bell Sleeve Top // Just Float On Flare Jeans

Oh and one more thing....I was invited to speak on the Just Fab and ShoeDazzle panel for their ambassador summit in New Orleans, and it was sooooo fun!  What's so cool about this opportunity is that earlier this year, I wrote in my journal that I wanted to begin empowering people using other platforms and share my knowledge and experiences as a fashion blogger and writer on panels - and look what happened!!! Manifestation is real ya'll!! Check out some of the pictures from the event below.  

Of course Ma Duke showed up and supported as always! 

Kelli Saulny of styleandtaste.com and Cymande D. Ford of shopplusisaplus.com

Thank you to Just Fab and ShoeDazzle and all of the extraordinary women I met at this event!!! 

Photos by - sharonpye.com

I Quit Part 2 - The Update

It’s been over a year since I threw in the towel at my job of eight years and started out on this faith journey.  I’ll wait a few more months to give you the entire spill because the story is still unfolding, but for now I’ll tell you this – leaving my secure job is one of the most gangster things I’ve ever done!!

Before this experience, I never really exercised faith to the fullest.  Now I have a deeper understanding of what it means to have nothing but faith in your corner; and because of this new understanding, I have matured tremendously.

“It’s easy to be independent when you’ve got money. But to be independent when you haven’t got a thing – that’s the Lord’s test.”

— Mahalia Jackson

Below is a quick summation of the things I’ve learned after quitting my job to pursue my own endeavors.   

1. Your journey will not look like everyone else’s – Before I decided to leave my job, I researched blog articles on what to expect after doing it and talked to others who had done it.  While they all gave out great advice, most of it didn’t apply to my situation.  My journey was not theirs, and I learned quickly that I had to set my own parameters and do what was best for me. 

2. You question your choice – The week or so after I quit my job, I was pumped and dancing all over the house….a few months later I asked myself, “what in the hell did I just do?”

3. It gets scary – Depending on your business, brand, or savings, it can get a little frightening at some point because you’re going from a steady paycheck to depending solely on yourself to make money moves and sometimes not knowing when you’ll get paid or where the next check will come from. 

4. You’ll see the light – If you hang in there and keep striving for what you set out to do, you’ll eventually see the light.  When your mindset is in the right place, when you consistently put in the work, and when you have faith that it will all work out – it will.  It may not look how you thought it would look, but it will work out.   

5. You’ll be proud – Despite the tribulations you experience after leaving your job to pursue another career or your personal endeavors, in the end you will always be proud of yourself for making that bold move.  Leaving my job to pursue a career in writing (and other things) was one of the best decisions I've ever made.  No matter how hard it gets while on this journey, the mere thought of me going back to a place that doesn't allow me to do what I love and what I've been formally educated to do makes me shiver in anguish.  And that thought alone keeps me on the path I am on.

Stay tuned for a more detailed story later….believe me when I say it’s a rollercoaster ride that I haven't gotten off of yet! 

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Jumper // Slides 

Be Still

The other day while in yoga class, the instructor gave us a set of poses to do.  After we completed the poses, she directed us to stand still.  During the standstill pose, I started fidgeting, looking around, I scratched my nose, wiped sweat from my forehead, etc.  Observing me and my other class members' constant movement, the instructor reiterated to the class, "stand still."  I scratched my nose again.  She went on to say to the class, "the hardest, yet most beneficial pose in yoga is standing still."  The light in my brain turned on. 

I've always had a problem with being still.  I have to constantly be doing something in order to feel like things are moving.  However, I'm in the process of learning that sometimes I have to possess enough faith and patience to just be still.  Practicing stillness allows me to calm my mind and spirit, lower my stress levels, be more present, appreciate the moment, and it also recharges my batteries. 

I read somewhere that resting is one of the most spiritual things a person can do.  I wholeheartedly agree with that statement.  Resting or being still is a way to let go and let God, honor ourselves, the precious moments we are given, and the hard work we do.  When we are constantly on the move, stress tends to creep up on us which in turn causes us to overlook chances to be grateful and to be in awe of the beautiful things happening around us.  Therefore it's healthy for us to step back for a second, breath, and just be still. 

Enjoy the rest of the week and Happy Mardi Gras and Valentine's Day to those who celebrate it.  I hope you all will add being still to your list of things to do this week.  We all work hard and deal with so much; therefore, we must take a minute to honor ourselves and be still.

Peace and Blessings,

    - Samjah Iman

Outfit Details:  Dad's Cap // Patent Leather Booties // Distressed Jeans (designed by me) // T-shirt (old) // Leather Bag

Stay Nourished

When I'm hungry I must admit, I am not the most pleasant person.  I get weak, I start to shake, and I'm short with whomever is around me.  As soon as I get some food inside of me, I'm back to being the chill Sam that I am.  In the past couple of years or so I've noticed that the symptoms I get when I haven't fed myself physically are the same symptoms I get when I haven't fed myself spiritually and mentally.  If I go days without spending time with myself, helping someone, reading, listening to music, taking a bike ride, or talking to my loved ones - I get irritated easily and my flow is completely thrown off.       

I can't do ANYTHING when I'm deprived of food physically, mentally, and spiritually.  If anyone has been around me when I'm full, they will probably attest to the fact that it's nothing but love and laughter.  I prefer that Sam.  Therefore, my new focus has been on making sure that I am full in all ways, ALWAYS. I want to constantly replenish myself so that I can give dynamically to everyone around me. 

If I have an empty refrigerator, I cannot feed others.  

Stay stocked, stay full, stay nourished.

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

   Outfit Details:  H&M Stripe Blouse (in stores only) // ASOS Red Trousers (sold out) // Vintage Eel Skin Purse // H&M PeaCoat (sold out)

Laying it Out in Leopard

This past week I experienced about 972 emotions pertaining to the recent debacle.  I went from scared to mad to perplexed to negative to sad to indifferent then back to mad.  While experiencing all of my emotions, I engaged in conversations with family members and friends to dissect the recent events.  After all of the conversations and my different emotions, I came to a conclusion.  It's time get our s@$% together.  

Life is hard.  It has been hard and will continue to be hard.  We need to stop looking for a break because we've never had one and possibly will never get one. We've been fighting to survive since the year of 1619, and the fight will not stop in 2017.  We are either going to complain about how we were, are, and will be treated, wait for God to drop something out of the sky, or pray and then jump in the fight by educating ourselves and our children more, loving ourselves more, eating healthier, exercising, handling our finances better, and creating opportunities for our successors.  We can continue to depend on them to help us...or help ourselves.  I choose to help myself. 

To be continued......   

Outfit Details:  Leopard Tights // Blue Jean Shirt // Stan Smith Adidas

- Samjah Iman