2023 Sparked A Self-First Revolution

Before I could fully come to terms with 2023 leaving, she grabbed her belongings and walked towards the door. Although I wonder what the rush is, I want her to go. She swept in swiftly after 2022 departed and started her stay off with many challenges. She threw several blessings in the mix as the months passed but didn't let up on the lessons. And because I was constantly pushed to reach new personal heights, I'm feeling a bit of end-of-year fatigue mixed with a heap of fulfillment. 

A beautiful metamorphosis took place in 2023 that leaves me feeling content. After a rocky first few months of the year, I settled into a rewarding spiritual journey comprised of extreme self-love and pouring heavily into myself. Of course, this self-care practice included the usual physical maintenance (hair did, nails did, everything did *see Drake's song "Fancy"). But, most importantly, it encompassed soulful, mental, and emotional maintenance. The kind of maintenance that forces you to fall deeply in love with yourself and abolish anything or anyone who tries to tamper with that love. 

After reading the book The 5AM Club: Own Your Morning, Elevate Your Life earlier in the year, I began to rearrange my life in a way that allowed me to wake up and check in with myself first. I have never been an early riser, but I pushed myself to become one, and it was life-changing. I became more productive, and my spirituality expanded because I had quiet time with God. This new routine allowed me to vibrate higher and made me realize how much of a spiritual and revolution act putting myself first was.

My friend and I began to dig deeper into the self-care realm together, embarking upon this reforming self-care journey that led to us starting a non-profit called Black Women For Self. For centuries, the world has been placing unrealistic expectations on Black Women, and a lot of us have fallen victim to those expectations, thus neglecting ourselves. Therefore, BWFS aims to revolt against those expectations and start a radical self-care movement encouraging Black Women to release, rest, and pour into themselves mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and physically. 

My self-revolution became one of the main focuses of my universe for 2023, and I only bothered to do a little writing outside of Hello Beautiful. Also, I didn’t have any words to share on this platform. This year was all about acting on the lessons I was learning. I don't know what next year will bring for this blog. I may let the words I've written on here continue to marinate until it's time for them to move to another platform, or I may come back with a compelling story. Either way, I'm only interested in doing what feels right to me - nothing more. Nonetheless, I appreciate y’all for rocking with me and being patient during my year of silence on here.

If you want to join the Black Women For Self movement, click here. We do bi-monthly events, all aimed at creating space for Black Women. Be sure to follow the organization on Instagram and TikTok. Also, if you care to keep up with my fashion and lifestyle, follow me on Instagram. 

I'll leave you with these:

I read somewhere that loving yourself is loving God - big fact. My friend also told me that Iyanla Vanzant once said everything in your cup is for you, and only the OVERFLOW is for others. Both of these notions hit home for me. 

From here on out, it's SELF first. And everyone in my circle benefits immensely from this concept.  

Until next time,

Peace & Blessings…

- Samjah Iman

Life Update: My Newest and Most Sacred Journey Will Begin Soon

Life has drastically changed for me over the past months. I’ve been giving myself the space to accept and fall in love with my latest blessing, and I’m still in awe of it all. I am currently 7 months pregnant!!!! As I type this I can’t believe it. I’ve had a whirlwind of emotions over the past several months during this new phase in my life, but the one I seem to come back to each time is gratefulness.

I’m so thankful. I’m thankful that I have been chosen to guide someone in this life as their mother. I remember when I used to sit and think about what motherhood would be like for me. Now it’s almost here, and I have to pinch myself to make sure I’m not dreaming. I know this task comes with a whirlwind of emotions, responsibilities, happiness, frustration, gaining patience, losing patience, worrying, etc. But a while ago, a friend said these words to me that I believe has helped shaped my view of this new parenting journey I’m about to embark upon. He said, “remember you aren’t raising a child to be in your house forever. You are raising a child to eventually go out into the world.” I held on to that advice. And with that mindset coupled with the wisdom I’ve collected from those who’ve gone on this journey before me, I will do my best to put a loving, aware, intelligent, considerate, independent, self-reflective, confident human being out in this world. Will I always get it right? Nope. But I plan to do the absolute best I can, and give it to my God when I can’t.

I chose to wait to tell the world about my pregnancy because naturally I’m a private person, and I wanted to allow myself the time to convene with God and my loved ones about this blessing first. I needed to take a moment and learn how to accept this blessing without questioning it or being fearful of the what ifs. I get that in a world where people constantly overshare most wouldn’t understand why I took my time revealing my news, but it’s not my responsibility to make others understand how I move. It’s only my responsibility to stay true to myself. This is one of the biggest faith walks I’ve ever taken, and the only voice I need to hear at times (besides my parent’s, close family, and my fiancé’s…yes I am engaged as well) is that voice inside of me - not the world’s.

And to my ladies who think they should be in a rush to have a baby because of their age or whatever, allow me to be your inspiration. I’m 39 and having my first child. I was able to live life on my terms for years before this moment. I was able to establish my writing career. I’ve traveled when I wanted to. I partied all night on several occasions. I slept in a millions times. I opted to eat cereal sometimes so I could buy expensive things. I had the luxury of thinking of myself only for as long as I can remember. So for me, this is the perfect time to dedicate myself to putting another decent human out in this world. While society did make me nervous about having children before my late 30’s, I didn’t allow the rhetoric to scare or rush me into anything that wasn’t for me. When it’s all said and done, I kept the faith in my decisions and did things my way. And I’m damn proud of myself for it too.

To be continued….

- Mama to be

Photos by @goldentimetay

Outfit Details: Nefertiti Necklace // Black Dress // White Heels

I Hope You Dance

There’s this song my mother loves by Lee Ann Womack (of course her favorite version of the song is by Gladys Knight) titled I Hope You Dance. The chorus of the song says, “And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance. I hope you dance.” The song is basically saying choose to live. Choose to experience the good things in life. Choose to let go. Choose to face challenges head on. Choose to have a positive attitude towards your obstacles. Choose to grow. Choose to love. Choose to try and choose to not be afraid to fail.

Lately this song has been on repeat in my head because I’ve been branching out. For starters, I went to the hairdresser and got braids for the first time in my life! Of course my mother would braid my hair as a child, but I’ve never had extra hair added to my head. As soon as I got the braids I was in love. Having a break from combing my hair feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulder. I’m hooked! I’m developing into this woman who is only concerned with her own opinion, and it feels amazing. I’m constantly traveling, I’m saying no to things that don’t concern me, I’m letting life surprise me, and I’m finally feeling like I’m worthy of all the blessings I am receiving. I’m trying things and not fretting if they don’t work out for me. I’m letting go of old ideologies. I’m taking on challenges and in the process, I’m giving myself more grace. I’m living life my way, and it feels so good to my soul.

There was a time when I was a bit more reserved…a little too calculated even. But there were no benefits in playing it safe. So I decided to release the grip, just be, and not give a damn about who had an opinion. Because when this life has come to an end, I’d rather be tired from taking chances, than mentally tired for constantly wondering what if. I’m dancing y’all.

Stay tuned…..

- Samjah Iman

P.S. - Also, please check out my article/interview below with Marlon Wayans on his role in the Aretha Franklin Movie Respect. He’s a super interesting guy!

Marlon Wayans Did ‘A Lot Of Soul Searching’ To Get Into ‘Respect’ Character | HelloBeautiful

Waiting on My Story

I’m taking things slow these days, and listening for God more. I’m contemplating my next business move and thus far, I’ve come up with NOTHING. Of course everyone has been lending me unsolicited advice on what they think my next venture should be. I’ve been told to sell clothes, makeup (of which I know nothing about), organic facial products, etc. And neither of these things get me excited.

Sometimes I get in a panic when people ask me when and if I’m going to take advantage of the influence I have on social media. I start to think that maybe I should just throw one of the suggestions I’ve been given on the wall and see what sticks. But then I have to remind myself that one of the most important lessons I’ve learned over the years is not to move on anything until I feel it in my soul.

Ya’ll know what I always say; when you are open to receiving a sign, the universe is open to giving you one. I was watching a movie on Netflix called Monster the other day, and the main character was having a discussion with his teacher and peers in his film class. The teacher was trying to get the students to realize that they needed a little more passion behind their art. He went on to explain his point by saying that when artists have a story to tell, it pains them to keep it inside. They ache with the desire to write it, film it, and share it. The main character/student then asked the teacher, “[as an artist] what if you don’t feel any of that?” The teacher replied, “THEN YOU HAVEN’T FOUND YOUR STORY.” Boom.

I paused the television and quickly wrote that line down. It was the reminder I needed. I can try this or that as my new venture, or listen to others and begin to feel like I’m behind. But the truth is plain and simple; I have not found my story yet. And I’m not moving on anything until it I find it. So back to the drawing board I go. I’ll emerge with a story to tell sooner…..or later.

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

Photo Credit: Welch Inc Photography

Outfit Details: Jeans (Target in store) // Top

In case you missed it….

Check me out here on the Essence Festival Beauty Carnival panel! The panel I’m on starts at the 3:53:00 mark. Hope you enjoy it!

Use Your Core

I’m still here. I’ve been doing a lot of writing for Hello Beautiful (yay!) which has been taking up the majority of my creative time. I’m flowing, not forcing things, and not crowding up my schedule these days. I’ve fallen in love with my new-found flexibility, and it’s making life more peaceful for me. It has taken me yeeeeaaarrrrssss to get to this place in my life, and I’m grateful.

Another thing that has been tremendously working for me is yoga. I know I’ve spoken about my yoga practice on here before, but during this time in my life I’m even more dedicated to it. It’s like a religion to me now. I practice it 3 times a week with a yogi (Black Yoga Bae) and 6 to 7 times a week on my own. In class, one of the main things my yoga teacher repeats constantly is, “use your core”. Whenever we are struggling to make a pose work or make our body move in an unfamiliar way, she emphasizes how using our core will help us conquer the feat. She is right. Because every time I go to pick myself up from a low lunge to Warrior 3 pose, it’s my core that supports and guides me. It’s amazing how when I don’t use my core, I struggle to get into position. But when I do rely on my core, it’s much easier to transition to the next pose. This truth also applies to my life.

Outfit Details: Tee // Jeans // Purse (Free People, old)

My center holds all the answers. It’s where my creator resides. When I make moves without being led by my core, I’m shaky. But when I allow my core to lead me, I’m unwavering and firm in my decision and purpose.

Strength and wisdom live in our core, and when we use it to sustain or guide us in any move we make we’re in alignment. This doesn’t mean the move won’t be uncomfortable or we won’t stumble at times, it means that we are cultivating our inner power, exercising our control, and strengthening our endurance. The core is where it’s at. Use it.

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

In case you missed these…..

Outfit Details: Dress // Shoes (old, Steve Madden)

Outfit Details: Tee // Nikes (old) // Jeans (American Eagle, old)

Also, if you want to check out some of my work on Hello Beautiful, a few links are below. Thank you!

How Misa Hylton Became Global Creative Partner For MCM | Misa Hylton: From Bad Boy Stylist To Global Creative Partner For MCM | HelloBeautiful

Zuri Hall talks Hot Happy Mess podcast, beauty and fashion | HelloBeautiful

#BlackTwitter’s Hilarious Reaction To Telfar’s Sold Out ‘Azalea’ Bag | HelloBeautiful

Life Update: I'm the One Who Needs the Work.

I’ve been over here practicing yoga, drinking water, sleeping, and appropriately feeding my mind, body, and spirit. While I’m enjoying this chill phase of my life, I’m also learning more about me. And one valuable lesson that keeps coming back to me is the lesson of self. Basically, it’s not them, it’s me. After a few failed attempts at trying to alter the world and the people in it, I came to the conclusion that it would be better for my health if I just concentrate on the only person I could control - me. Before I came to this conclusion, I found myself falling back into the rut of trying to get people to see things differently, to prove how right I was and how wrong the other person was, to try and make people be considerate, nice, etc. I was running myself absolutely crazy while people were seemingly so peaceful with being idiots :-). I knew something was off. I was making life waaaaay harder than it had to be, and I had to realign quick.

Of course, as the universe will have it, the teacher appears when the student is ready. I went to my YouTube app one day to find the perfect meditation soundtrack, and I came across the Tao Te Ching. I listened intently. One thing the narrator said that caught my attention was this…Mastering others requires force. Mastering the self needs strength. - The Tao

Trying to stop a dog from being a dog is senseless. You can’t change the ways of the dog, but you can change if or how you deal with those ways. This is the journey I’m on. I’m no longer pointing the finger outward. I’m pointing it inward. My concentration has been on discovering and tending to my triggers. I now look at every encounter, every situation, and every relationship as a learning experience - a chance for me to see how much I’ve grown and how much work I still have to do. I wake up everyday and make a vow (that I break from time to time lol) to only control what I can control, and let the rest be. Operating this way has afforded me more peace. I’m seeing the fruits of my labor which makes me even more excited to continue on this path. I’m not sure where this current journey will lead me, but I have a feeling that because of this new way of living, blessings will ensue. I’ll keep you all posted.

Outfit Details: Top and Skirt // Heels (old - Steve Madden)

I took a blog sabbatical, but I was still putting looks together! In case you’re not following me on Instagram, below are some of the styles you’ve missed!

Outfit Details: Dress // Boots (old)

Outfit Details: Blazer (old) // Biker Shorts // Crop Top // Tennis (old)

Outfit Details: Crop Top // Joggers // Boots

Outfit Details: Jogger Set // Hat

Outfit Details: T-shirt // Jeans (Target in-store) // Heels

Outfit Details: Jogger Set

Outfit Details: Jacket (Custom made by Aud Culture) // Leggings // Boots

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

Releasing the Grip...Again

Below is a blog post I wrote some time ago. I’m not reposting it for you all, I’m reposting it for me. I’m relearning some stuff I already know to be true, and this blog post speaks to the concept I’m focusing on which is setting your attentions then letting nature handle the rest. I’ve been reflecting on and comparing the times when I did the least and received the most to the times where I did the most, and received the least. Therefore, rediscovering this post has added even more value to the teachings I’m currently receiving. I hope it blesses you all as well.

“True mastery can be gained by letting things go their own way. It cannot be gained by interfering. ”

— Tao Te Ching

Old Post -

I’m always trying to figure out how I can speed a process up, help a process out, or get rid of a process all together.  I’m constantly thinking that maybe I’m not doing enough, or maybe I should have said this, or maybe I just need to add a little more of that to make it better.  When in actuality, all I’m doing is interfering with the natural/spiritual process that is taking part on my behalf.  It seems when I’m constantly trying to make something work, it moves further away from me.  But when I release it, it works out how it’s supposed to work out when I least expect it. 

The other day I was reminded of some simple yet sound advice my father gave me years ago that can be applied to any situation.   Back then I was battling some acne issues which made me obsessed with every product that claimed to rid my face of the hideous critters.  I would walk around the house every night with about 20 creams on my face then follow those up with some new mask.  I did this religiously for about two weeks but nothing seemed to help.  One night, with a white mask caked on my face, I walked into the kitchen - passing my father up in the living room - to get a snack.  My father, whom I’m assuming was tickled at the sight of his daughter resembling a mime, took one look at my face and smirked.  Just as I was about to head back to my domain, he stopped me and said, “you know the bumps will eventually go away if you just leave them alone and stop focusing on them.”  In typical teenage fashion, I rolled my eyes and continued on the journey to my room to sulk.  But his words sat with me.  The next day, I didn’t use any of the masks or creams I accumulated, nor did I use them the day after that, or the day after that.  I just did the simple tasks of washing, toning, and moisturizing.  I also made it my business not to stare at the bumps in the mirror every chance I got, and just like daddy said - they eventually went away.      

Declare what you want, control the part you can control, then release your grip and watch life work its magic. By doing so you allow all the bumps to work themselves out, and eventually things will change. And what's for you, will come to you.

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Sweatshirt // Coat (vintage) // Boots

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

39 Challenging Lessons I'm Still Learning

I’m 39 years old today, and it is absolutely hilarious! I’m still trying to figure out how I jumped from worrying about keeping up with every style choice and dance move TLC (the popular 90’s R&B girl group) made, to cursing in my head while I’m at the grocery store because I literally have only 5 food items on the conveyor belt - and my total is $69.72!! Jesus! But no matter how tough, easy, or EXPENSIVE life gets - I’m grateful. I’m grateful that I’m here to experience all that the universe offers. Life has afforded me some beautiful lessons. Some were easy to learn while others are still being embedded in my psyche.

You may see the lessons I’ve written below next year….and maybe even the year after that. That’s because I am still learning. I will always be learning. My focus is not on mastering anything, it’s centered on giving myself grace as I cruise through the unpredictable waves of life because this experience is a journey, not a conquest. And with that written, below are my 39 lessons I’m still learning.

1. Blaming other people for your mishaps and poor decisions is futile. Learn from past mistakes, forgive yourself, move the hell on, and be prepared to make some new mistakes. That’s how you gain wisdom, Sam.

2. Trust God’s timing, it is PERFECT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Every delay, every no, every not now is for a reason! Some times we will know the reason, some times we won’t. That is where faith comes in.

3. Your intuition is the most valuable asset you possess. Use it, use it some more, and use it again. The more you use it, the stronger it becomes. The more you ignore it, the more faint it becomes.

4. Believe what he/she shows you, not what he/she says.

5. You’re always going to be learning. Gaining knowledge and wisdom never ceases. In fact, the more you know - the more confused you may be.

6. You only have a few friends…just a few. The older you get, the less you will have - and that’s okay.

7. Talk to your loved ones (especially your parents) as often as you can. They don’t stay around forever. You won’t either.

8. Always ask yourself if you are living for you or for someone else. Peer pressure is real and can distort even the most confident person’s view.

9. Save more money girl. Life is full a surprises and some of them cost a fortune (like grocery store trips *insert eye roll*).

10. Vulnerability is actually a sign of strength. Open your heart. It’s a courageous act.

11. This too shall pass.

12. Gather your thoughts before you speak in a heated discussion. It’s easier to do damage than to undo it.

13. Breathe…..just breathe. Take deep breaths. They really help.

14. Try to always operate in a state of gratefulness. The universe responds abundantly to that. It also helps make life a little easier.

15. Deep connections energize you. Keep seeking them.

16. Your alone time is non-negotiable. It revitalizes you. It nurtures your spirit. Don’t ever let anyone infringe upon that…..no matter how cute they are lol.

17. Understand that other people are fighting battles too. Sometimes their decisions have nothing to do with you but everything to do with their experiences, situations, fears etc. Get over yourself.

18. Don’t be afraid to take chances. At the least you’ll have an interesting story to tell.

19. Stop looking, and you’ll find it.

20. You are going to be pissed off at yourself in the future if you look back and see that you dimmed your light. To avoid a mid-life crisis, be who you are fully meant to be right now.

21. Listen more than you talk. Sometimes if you let the other person do the talking, you’ll learn everything you need to know without having to seek.

22. Check yourself often. Being self-aware is the most wise thing you can do.

23. Rest is spiritual….that is when you hear from God.

24. Continue to give things away for free. This could be advice, things you no longer need, a smile, a compliment, or a listening ear. It feeds your soul when you give. The reward is contentment.

25. Say no to anything that doesn’t serve you. Saying no (and sometimes saying yes) shows self-confidence.

26. Remember to put yourself on a mind diet often. Some things that aren’t mean to positively serve you can seep into your subconscious without you even knowing it. Monitor what you monitor.

27. Be okay with being misunderstood. Not everyone is on the same path as you and that’s okay.

28. Continue to exercise. Show God your appreciation for the temple you were blessed with by taking care of it.

29. Have a lazy day at least once a month. DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ON THAT DAY! This revitalizes you and boosts your creativity.

30. It’s okay if you don’t have all the answers. Be confident in what you don’t know as well as what you do know. Also, it’s okay to be wrong. That’s how you learn.

31. It is not your responsibility to fix everyone. God loves them even more than you love them. So let God take care of them. You tend to yourself.

32. Don’t be afraid to start over. There are blessings in new beginnings.

33. Tell yourself the truth always, then be as honest as you can with others. The truth may be hard at first in some instances, but it saves you a lot of turmoil in the long run.

34. Read and travel as often as you can. These are two of the best ways to educate yourself.

35. Connect with nature more. Take walks, let the sun embrace you. This is therapy.

36. Remember that success is subjective. You don’t have to want what the world wants. Your success doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. As long as it’s fulfilling to you, that’s all that matters.

37. Try to do what’s right now so that you won’t have to pay for it later. A lot of people are still living with mistakes they made yeeeaaaarrrsss ago. Take heed.

38. Live out as many dreams as possible. If they don’t work out, so what? At least you can say you tried.

39. Focus on the good, and the good will multiply.

Peace and Blessings,

- The Birthday Girl

Outfit Details: Y’all, I have absolutely no outfit details on this look because everything is old! I purchased these pants from ASOS about eight years ago! The shirt I’m wearing is a long, white buttoned-down that I tied up, and the shoes came from Steve Madden years ago. Sorry!

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

Being Selfish is My Mode of Operation From Now On....

I just left the hospital yesterday. I had a minor procedure done (lady stuff). I’m healing and resting. Although the circumstances weren’t favorable, I found the blessing in the storm. I know for sure that one of the purposes of these circumstances was for me to get some much needed rest. I’m currently being selfish, and it feels so good. For the first time in a while, my mind and body are still. And it only took me having to go to the hospital for that to happen. Wow.

I’ve been saying for the last few months that I needed some rest, but I wasn’t following through. After I resigned from my job in December, I wanted to hit the ground running with my freelance career. My mind was steady racing everyday about everything I needed to do. I feared that if I gave myself a break, I would miss a lucrative opportunity. I was doing my yoga in the morning and all the meditative stuff, but sometimes I would even rush that to get to my work. Subconsciously, I began to carry that familiar guilt on my shoulders that almost every black woman bears - the guilt that we must be superwoman to every problem and everyone except our needs and ourselves. I don’t know how I began to feed into this notion because I try my best not to subscribe to that “black women should be strong all the time and keep going no matter what” crap, but there I was…lying in the hospital bed (enjoying the silence and hospitality might I add) and thinking, “Yup Sam, God had to sit you down so that you can understand that it’s time for you to become a little more selfish.” I heard God, and I’m taking heed.

“Taking care of yourself is taking care of others.” My 96-year-old grandmother uttered those words to me out of the blue this past summer while I was sitting on her plastic-covered couch, squinting at her 32-inch television. I now feel those words deep in my soul. I love to work and will continue to grind…but at my own pace. Wealth to me is good health, a flexible schedule, and peace. I’m giving myself permission to ignore calls and delay responses to emails and messages when I need to. I will extend myself even more grace and will allow myself to take whatever I need to off my plate to remain sane. I will feel the strength and confidence (instead of weakness) in saying “I won’t be able to do that right now…or never.” I will have however many lazy moments I need. I will take the time to sit and read a book without thinking about what else needs to be done. I will give myself a moment (if not more) out of each day to be selfish, and I will not beat myself up about it. This is my creed, and I will refer back to this post when I need to. Peace and blessings, y’all.

Selfishly,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Vintage Leather Coat // Heels (Steve Madden, old) // Skirt (Free People, old) // Top (Zara, old) // Sunglasses (vintage hand-me-downs)

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

Recognizing My Power...

It’s January 7th, 2021 at 11:39 a.m. I’m writing this blog post from the comfort of my kitchen table. As I sip my water and nosh on my King Cake, I’m in a state of calmness. Ironically, Nas’ classic song, The World is Yours, is seeping through my Bluetooth speaker. I chuckle. His words match my sentiments. I’m reveling in the fact that there’s an apparent shift happening in the universe, and I’m 100% positive that I am on the right side of that shift.

Of course the buffoonery that was displayed yesterday at the U.S. Capitol showed us what we already knew…white privilege is alive and well. But through all the pandemonium, my understanding of just how powerful my people are became even more apparent. Those terrorists where not only acting out of stupidity, they were acting out of cowardice. They are scared. They are scared that the nation they worked so hard to steer in their direction is slipping right from under their weak palms. They are scared that more of us finally woke up, and that the power we as black people showed in this last presidential election and in Georgia will be exercised from here on out. Although yesterday wasn’t a laughing matter, I couldn’t help but smile. I smiled because my power is so persuasive, my voice is so resounding, my vote is so critical, it brings the demonic spirit out of suckers, it rallies the positive activists, it puts officials in and out of government seats, it changes the political trajectory of racist states, and it gives hope to future generations. With this much power, there is no need for me to wait for life to go in my direction. I can get what I want, when I want it, how I want it. I come from brilliant people, and with the technology and resources I have at my finger tips - I should be doing it bigger and better than they did. All I have to do is tap into the power that lives right in my spirit, and I will.

Recognize the power you have, and use it wisely. Continue to flourish, continue to heal, continue to use your talents for your benefit and then for the greater good of our community. It’s our time y’all….let’s make our foremothers and forefathers proud.

Walking in my power,

- Samjah Iman

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

Outfit Details: Floral Turtle Neck // Wide Leg Pants // Purse

Life Update: I Want To Live Today

Quick Story: On November 18th of this year, around 2 pm, I received a text informing me my good friend had transitioned from this life. I couldn’t believe the words on my phone screen. I read them over and over. I just talked to my friend on that Friday (Nov. 13th) so I figured someone, somewhere, had something mixed up. I decided to call his phone to let him know the foolery I had just received on my phone. He didn’t answer. So I texted him…no response. Then after about an hour or so of being in denial, his best friend called me to confirm what I didn’t want to believe. My friend had left the earth at the age of 35. I couldn’t grasp what I just heard. I kept saying out loud, “huh??” I got up from my desk to close my office door so no one would walk by and notice the sunken look on my face.

After gathering myself, I opened the files on my computer. I searched for a particular document I had been pondering on for a while. I was going to give this document to the powers that be at the so-called appropriate time. But after receiving the news I had just received, I realized that for this matter, there was no better time than the present. I edited the date and then printed my resignation letter and marched it right into my supervisor’s office. I’m stepping out on faith…again.

I told the story of my friend’s passing not because I need your expressions of sympathy. I’m doing just fine and with time I will be even better. I wanted to share that story with you all so that you too can be motivated to live for today. The time is now to do whatever is in your heart. I’m not saying quit your jobs. I’m saying LIVE…however that looks to you…just do it. Do what you have to do as a responsible adult, but make sure you top that off with what you want to do as well.

On another note, I haven’t talked to you all in about 2 1/2 weeks so I’ll catch you guys up on some of what I have been doing. See below.

What I’ve Been Listening To: I decided to take a trip down memory lane and pull out Erykah Badu’s Mama’s Gun album. The album is celebrating its 20th birthday so what better way to pay homage to this thought-provoking art than by listening to it. The more I play the songs, the more I realize it was meant for me to revisit this album. It is speaking to the times I’m currently in. On one of her songs titled Time’s A Wastin , Erykah smoothly sings, “Keep on drifting…ain’t no telling where you’ll land.” That line adequately describes my current journey.

On the podcast tip, I’ve been revisiting old episodes from Side Hustle Pro. I love hearing the stories of women who are side hustlers-turned-moguls. Listening to where they started and how they got to where they are now is the motivation I need at this moment.

Who I’m Currently Inspired By: ANGEL ANDERSON - owner of THE SPICE SUITE in DC!!! You have to listen to her story (here) if you haven’t already heard of her!! This girl is goals!! I love her style and how she fuses fashion and food. She never set out to start her business. It just happened, and it is absolutely booming!! I’ve been following her on social media for a while and it so gratifying to see her growth. Home girl will rock the cutest pair of tennis shoes or a fabulous fur coat while cooking up a colorful dish using a special blend of spices that came from Morocco or India! Check her social media out here. You will not be disappointed!

What I’ve Been Working On: I’m currently working on my mindset. I want to control my thoughts as much as possible. Everything begins with a thought so therefore I’m creating abundance in my mind and letting it manifest into reality. Watch me work.

What I’ve Been Reading: I’m currently reading Party of One: The Loners' Manifesto by Anneli Rufus. It’s kind of slow so it’s taking me a while to get through it. I may put it down and come back to it. I got the news a week or so ago that one of my favorite authors, Sista Souljah, is coming out with the sequel to The Coldest Winter Ever (one of the best books in the world!!). I CANNOT WAIT! Life After Death will drop around March 2nd. YESSSSSS!!!!

Quote of the Month: What is possible and not possible is not your business. It’s nature business. Your business is just to strive for what you want. - Sadhguru

Let’s Live Y’all

- Samjah Iman

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

Outfit Details: Vintage Sweatshirt // Beret (old, similar one here) // Boots (kinda similar ones here)

It's the Little Things....Like a Subway Salad

Last week I had the honor of meeting a kind man who was recently released from prison after being locked up for 45 years (of course his sentence was too harsh for the crime he committed). He offered to share his story with me and a few other people, and I really couldn’t believe my ears as he laid out the awful details of his turbulent journey. “I believed I was going to die in prison. , he said. I lost most of my family while I was in there so when I was released, I had no choice but to sleep under the bridge for a while.” He went on to talk about how he eventually got back on his feet with the help of a local agency, and that he is blessed and optimistic that things will continue to get better for him. After he finished sharing his story, one of the listeners decided to ask the kind man what he wanted for Christmas. I just knew the kind man was going to say something like a bike, maybe a watch, a gift card, or something that would contribute to his new life outside of prison. Hell, if they asked me I would have surely asked for a vintage purse. But to my surprise, he asked for something that I would have never thought to ask for if I was in his position. “I’m extremely blessed, and I really don’t need anything. , he said. But if you would like to get me something….this may make you laugh…but….I’ve always wanted a Subway salad.” I felt humbled, sad, and extremely grateful all at the same time.

Just when you think you don’t have enough, someone somewhere else is wishing for the bare minimum. I sometimes find myself getting caught up in social programming which causes me to think that I need more….more money, more subscribers, more followers, more space, more clothes, more time, more this, more that. When in actuality, I have everything I need and then some.

“Needing nothing attracts everything.”

— Unknown

The conversation with the kind man reminded me to just be content. Peace comes from contentment, less stress comes from contentment, and more blessings come from contentment. As we go into this Thanksgiving holiday, let’s remember to appreciate what we already have. And if you find yourself being greedy or not satisfied with what’s going on in your life, remember those who would give anything to be in your shoes. Happy Thanksgiving my people!

Content,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Blouse (Zara, in store only) // Jeans (American Eagle) // Mules (Steve Madden no longer available)

Walking Like I'm Talking...

I’m in this weird/cool space where I’d rather be taking steps instead of talking about taking steps. I love to motivate people and be motivated, but at some point…we all have to trust in our abilities and walk it like we talk it. It’s beneficial to read all the self-help books, to repeat and write down affirmations, and to share and screenshot the inspirational memes from social media - but when are we going to actually show up? I’m not talking about the showing up that requires us to remain in our comfort zones. I’m referring to the showing up that forces us to go beyond our limits.

I proudly watched Kamala Harris stride across that stage last Saturday evening (to the sounds of Mary J. Blige!) as the US Vice President-elect. I was smiling from ear to ear as I sat in awe of the moment (black people, I am so damn proud of us!). I’ve been contemplating my next creative/career move for months now, and watching Kamala stand boldly before millions, donning a classic white pantsuit, got me amped. I didn’t get an “ah-ha” moment during her speech, and I’m still unclear about the exact direction I want to go in…but what her speech and presence did do was push me to want to take off. I’m going to just start walking towards my new season (whatever it shall be)…boldly and blindly. I have no idea where I will end up, I just know it’s time to move. It’s time to show my face and let fate do the rest. And the one thing I have a substantial amount of faith in is when I take the first step, the Universe will make way for the second.

Not living up to our full potential is a total disgrace to this current era we are in. We have more accessibility to the world and opportunities than we have ever had before; all we have to do is genuinely put ourselves out there and keep pushing. The other day I was scrolling on Instagram, and I saw someone promoting a book of Instagram captions that people can use under their pictures. AND IT WAS SELLING!!!!!!!!!!!!! I stared at the advertisement in amazement. If that didn’t push me to make some kind of move, I’m not sure what else will.

I think we (really talking to myself) have listened to enough podcasts, read enough “How To” books, and wrote down and posted enough affirmations. Of course it’s always good to soak up as much knowledge as you can, but now it’s time to implement that knowledge.

Let’s trust ourselves. Let’s walk the walk.

Strutting,

- Samjah Iman

In Case You Missed It - I took a little break from S&E to do some research (i.e. basically live life). Below is what I have been wearing while I was away. I included links to the looks that are still available. Talk to you all soon!

Outfit Details: Top (Zara - in store) // Boots

Outfit Details: Everything in this pic is old. :-/

Outfit Details: Dress (Zara - in store) // Boots

Outfit Details: Sweatshirt // Joggers (old) // Sneakers

I Am the Daughter Of...

A week or so ago I wasn’t feeling that black girl magic aura around me. My body was acting funny, my environment seemed cluttered, work was piling up, and my motivation was dwindling. I needed a boost. I needed to be reminded that I still had the power to move forward despite the stress that surrounded me. I eventually surrendered to my feelings and opened myself up to receive anything positive. And not too soon after I pleaded for any type of encouragement or motivation, I checked my email.

Months ago my good friend forwarded me an email which included an invitation to join a 21-day walking meditation series that highlighted black women and their accomplishments in history. This series was hosted by Girl Trek - an organization that advocates for the mental and physical health of black women. This is the same organization that hosted the beautiful live discussion on Facebook between Angela Davis and Nikki Giovanni. So of course I signed up for the series….it was my type of groove. However - I didn’t keep up with the series like I wanted to. So a week or so ago when I was pleading to get out of my funk, I opened my email and saw that Girl Trek was hosting another 21-day walking prayer meditation that highlighted more phenomenal, relatable black people. I joined it, and jumped on the call the next day. Long story short…my soul thanked me.

I got on the call, and the two ladies who created Girl Trek were having an informal conversation about the struggles we as black women face daily and how they’ve pushed through them. It felt like home. It was like being on a three-way call with my girls. They laughed, shed some tears, excitedly finished each other’s sentences, and then they had someone pray over everyone on the call. But the main thing they did that caught my attention was summons their ancestors for strength. They reached back and borrowed some of that tenacity our foremothers so graciously carried with them through life’s trials. I felt the power of that conjure. My spirit was touched. I began to feel alive again immediately.

Sometimes we not only have to remind ourselves who we are, but from whom we came. Those ladies on that call got me thinking about my lineage. I thought about how my mother overcame some of her biggest battles in life, how my grandmother (on my mother’s side) believed in pressing on no matter how dark the day looked, and how my great-grandmother (on my father’s side) took on the responsibility of toiling in the fields (after the death of her husband) in order to continue to feed all of their children. After hanging up that call and thinking about my predecessors, my chest was swollen with pride. I stood right where I was and said to myself, “I am the daughter of Pamela, who is the daughter of Gladys, who is the daughter of Georgia Ann, who is the daughter of Momma Aim.” Resilience runs through my blood. Love runs through my blood. Discipline runs through my blood. Perseverance runs through my blood. Royalty runs through my blood. Prayers were released into the atmosphere for me before I even set foot on this earth. I will not lose.

“No weapon formed against me shall prosper, ‘cause I’m walking with the prayers of my mother. ”

— India Arie

I encourage you all to reach back into your lineage for some strength. Know that we all come from some powerful sisters and brothers whether we know them or not. Remember the power we seek is already in us. All we have to do is tap into it.

Rooted in Royalty,

Pam’s Daughter

Outfit Details: Shirt // Pants (old)

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

If you would like to join the call, it’s not too late. It takes place every week day (not weekends) at 11 am CST. The information to call in is below. If you need some uplifting, please call…..you won’t regret it!

Dial: 1 (646) 876-9923 CODE: 734464325 (push pound after you enter the code and then the recording will ask you for another code or give you the option to push pound again - push pound again.)        

It's Not About the External Resources...

“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”

— Mark Twain

Typing the above quote brought the movie Hustle & Flow to mind.  I remember watching Ludacris and Terrence Howard recite this truism in unison and at the time, I didn’t think much of it. So I went back to that scene on YouTube, and I paid close attention to their conversation.  Terrence’s character (DJay) had been anxious to connect with Luda’s character’s (Skinny Black) because he was a huge fan of his artistry; particularly his first album. So in this scene, DJay was able to finally meet Skinny Black and hold a conversation with him. DJay praised Skinny Black’s first album and Skinny Black smiled in appreciation and made it known that he recorded that album in his mother’s laundry room. DJay then went on to say, “It’s not enough for a man to climb Mt. Everest. He gotta (sic) do that shit with the least amount of tools. One man and his skills.” Skinny Black then said, “Like the Samurai say (sic), the sword is only as powerful as its master.” Then DJay recited the Mark Twain quote and Skinny Black joined in. Whew child, after watching that exchange I felt like the doors of the church were open. I got all the proverbs I needed out of that small scene.

I’m assuming most of you have heard about the David and Goliath story from the bible. Well that whole Hustle & Flow scene piggybacks off that bible story in my opinion. It was hard to imagine David defeating Goliath because he didn’t have the fancy weapons, strength, or mass that Goliath possessed. But it turned out that David didn’t need any swords or big muscles to win the battle because what he was armed with was waaaaay more vicious. David had the internal artillery….he had the fight inside of him. Also, think about the story of Jesus feeding 5,000 people with just five loaves of bread and two fish. He didn’t make any excuses about the market running out of food or anything like that. He just showed up with what He had and made it happen. But some of us still won’t pursue our dream because we’re waiting on our bank accounts to reflect a certain number or our inventory to be overflowing (shaking my head).

I wrote all that to say that it’s time out for excuses. A lot of us are thinking we need a certain amount of social media followers, a nice office, an elaborate website, a high-tech camera, or a resourceful network to accomplish what we wish to accomplish. When in actuality, all you need is maybe a few small things and, most importantly, the determination to get things cracking. So many great things have been birthed from little to no resources. And when you think about it, resources actually play a small part in making anything happen. The true power to make things shake lies within the human.

So the next time you shy away from something because you don’t have enough of this or that or you back down from a challenge because you don’t have what you think you need to succeed, remember how David bust Goliath’s head with just a stone and a sling. Remember how Jesus fed multiple people with just a small amount of bread and fish.

External resources are good to have, but they don’t determine your outcome - the internal resources do. A lot can come from a little. Let’s not concentrate so much on the tangibles, let’s put our faith in the intangible.

Doing the most with the least,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Dopeaholics Hat // Romper // Vans

I got one more thing to show you before you leave this page!! When you get a second, check me out on the Introvert N The City podcast here. I’m discussing how it feels to be a black woman entrepreneur and some more things. I hope you enjoy it! Thanks for the support in advance! xoxo

Oh and screw the system/people who didn’t bring proper justice to Breonna Taylor’s case…UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Photo Credit: 87 Photography

This Is My Life Homie, You Decide Yours...

Do you know how it feels to hold your stomach in for a long period of time?  It’s difficult and uncomfortable, right?  At any moment you feel like you could pop or explode.  You desire deeply to exhale and let it all hang out, but you’re afraid of the judgment that comes with someone seeing the real you.  So now you’re walking around the world, holding yourself in, pretending to be something you’re not, just so you can live up to an image of perfection that doesn’t exist.  Sounds stupid, huh?  It does…but it happens - and how it feels to hold your stomach in for long periods of time is how I feel when I’m living my life for someone else other than myself.  I feel like I can’t breathe properly…like at any minute, I will pop - and I did.       

Not too long ago I did a quick overview of my life and asked myself what percentage of my life was my idea, and what percentage of my life was other people’s ideas.  I didn’t like the results.  I thought about how many decisions I made because I thought it would look good to my family or because I thought it would coincide with the image everyone had of me in their heads.  I didn’t like the results of those thoughts either.  I also thought about how pissed I would be if I created a life that others thought I should create only to become resentful that I didn’t create the life I wanted to create.  After sitting with those thoughts for a second, I wrote this declaration in my journal…“to hell with who they think I am or what they think I should do, because the only person who has to pay for my decisions is me.  Therefore, my opinion should be the only one that counts.”

For as long as I can remember I’ve been combating and/or feeding into people’s perception of me.  I remember in high school I desperately wanted to play basketball as a freshman (and I did), but my brother’s then-girlfriend thought I looked more like a cheerleader so she persuaded me to try out for the squad.  I remember only dating a certain type of guy for a long time because those were the types of guys people thought I should be with.  I remember my college advisor trying her hardest to get me to join a sorority because I fit their aesthetic, but deep down I knew that wasn’t my vibe.  It’s hard to stay true to yourself in a world that doesn’t encourage and celebrate authenticity.  And even though staying true to yourself is not popular, it’s a major key to liberation.  Because if you let others dictate your life, you don’t truly own it.       

“If I didn’t define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people’s fantasies for me and eaten alive.”

— Audre Lorde

You know that feeling of relief you get when you finally unbutton some snug pants you’ve been wearing all day, or that feeling you get when you stop tensing up and you relax all your muscles then exhale with your entire body?  That’s the feeling I experienced when I finally stop holding the real me in.  And from that day forward I vowed not to create another façade in order to be accepted.  I also vowed to let it all hang out, no matter the judgment that followed.  Because being my true self feeds my soul, being someone I’m not takes away from it.

Life is short so I may as well please the person I’m with all the time….and that’s me.

My life - my way,

- Samjah Iman

P.S. - Hey my people! If you get a chance, check me out in this Hello Beautiful article. I’m honored!!! Talk to you all soon! xoxo  

Outfit Details: Graphic Tee (coming soon here) // Joggers (old Forever 21), Nike Sacai Tennis

Sometimes I Sits and Thinks and Sometimes I Just Sits...

When I was a kid, I remember being so frustrated with my mother because I felt like she didn’t sit down enough. There was always one more chore to do, one more meeting to be at, or one more errand to run. Big P (my mother) would be moving in and out the house doing 12 things at once while I observed her in exasperation. I would get so fed up from watching her jump from one thing to another that I would spring up from whatever I was doing and say with passion and concern, “Momma, why won’t you just sit down?!” My little soul was disturbed by her hastiness, and I didn’t understand why she couldn’t just drop everything and take a moment to chill……then I became an adult.

Here I am 30 years later wondering why I just can’t sit the hell down sometimes. It’s like I feel guilty when I have free time, and I find myself trying to fill it with something. Before I started writing this blog post, I was thinking of at least five things I needed to be doing at the moment. I called my mother and started rattling off the things I wanted to accomplish today but could not because of inclement weather. Then I said, “I just can’t sit here and do nothing.” To that statement, Big P replied with the following quote: Sometimes I sits and thinks and sometimes I just sits (some say this quote is from Winnie the Pooh, some say otherwise). She then reminded me of the times I used to ask her to just sit down which was basically her smooth way of saying, “Sam, take your own advice.”

Sitting and doing nothing is so underrated in today’s society, yet it’s such an essential thing to do. I’m the one who creates the goals and finish lines in my life yet and still I’m rushing like I’m on someone else’s clock. I sometimes get so caught up in societal standards that I find myself jumping through hoops and going super hard just to feel like I’m keeping up. Yes I have things to do and goals I want to see come to fruition, but I also have a spirit that needs tending to as well. If I don’t take the time to reflect and do absolutely nothing, I won’t be able to give my goals 100 percent and most importantly, I won’t be able to hear from God.

I’m challenging you all, as well as myself, to take some time this week to just sit and think or just sit. Let’s make sure we are giving ourselves the space to be productive as well as the space to be rejuvenated.

Happy sitting,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Cliff Multi Snake Sneakers and Fanny Pack // All-in-one White Romper

I No Longer Wear a Mask

I couldn’t stand my mask. Every chance I got to take it off, I was beyond relieved.  I felt free, unrestricted – like I could let it all hang out.  It was hard to express myself with a covering.  I was just going through the motions like the rest of the world; covering up for fear of being exposed or exposing.  When I had the mask
on, I often hoped someone could see the real me through my eyes.  Then maybe they would become intrigued enough to ask for more of me.  Sometimes, when no one was looking (usually in my own privacy or around family), I’d pull the mask down to show my own self a little more of me.  I missed the real me when the mask was on, and I needed to make sure I was still there. I was.  Behind that mask every bit of me was still intact – waiting to be freed.  I came alive when that mask was off.  I smiled harder, asked millions of questions, made funny faces, did goofy impressions.  I even frowned here and there.  Halfway through my sans-mask theatrics, I would begin to dread going back out into the real world because I knew I had to pull the mask back up in fear of judgment. 

One day I got bold.  I had enough of hiding.  I decided to show my entire face.  On that day I did not
give two damns about who saw me, who whispered about me, or even who stopped being my friend.  I wanted to feel at home in my soul.  I wanted to be who God intended me to be.  So, I did just that.  I ripped that mask off and came alive.  And you better believe I was all of Sam and then some.  I took the light I was given and flashed it every chance I got.  And from that day forth, I never put that mask on again.  It did not matter what the world was doing or what I would lose.  I was only concerned about feeding the joy inside of me and what I would gain from doing so. 

“Working pleasing me, cause I can’t please you, and that’s why I do what I do. ”

— Erykah Badu

If you haven’t caught on just yet, I’m not talking about the mask I wear to block Covid and protect others from my germs (I wear that mask faithfully, okay?!).  I’m talking about the mask I wore years before Covid.  The one I used to wear to disguise my true self so that others would feel comfortable.  I grew up surrounded by a culture that did not praise people for being who they were meant to be.  In my school environment, the more you flaunted your true self – the more your peers envied you. They loved for you to wear a mask because they wore one so naturally themselves.  Back then I did not know their hate had everything to do with them and nothing to do with me.  I was a typical teenager who was finding herself but at the same time wanting to make friends with everyone.  I quickly learned that one of those two things had to go.  Either I was going to shine the light God granted me or dim it to try and fit in.  After many trials and errors (even some current relapses here and there), I concluded that having only a select, few friends is enough; however, shinning my light and not wearing a mask is nonnegotiable.  Those two things are essential for me to breathe. 

“I was always too concerned about what everybody would think. But I can’t live for everybody. I got to live my life for me. ”

— India Arie

Every now and then I find myself reverting to that junior high girl who wanted everyone to like her.  Then I check myself.  I remember my purpose.  I recall that taking off my mask and being who I’m truly meant to be not only feeds my soul, it also gives that next girl, boy, woman, or man permission to pull that mask down and show us their full face.  Me sprinkling my spicy Sam dust on the world gives it that kick it needs.  Because if we all put the same flavor in this world, how dull would it be?  Give the world the real you, someone needs to see it to be the real them.        

Keep your Covid masks on my babies, take the invisible ones off though.

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Thou Shalt Tee // Shorts (Homemade) // Mules (sold out) // Hat

Photographer: Welch Inc Photography

I Quit - Part 4......The Journey Continues

Around this time three years ago I was reveling in the fact that I built up enough nerve to walk away from a job that I had nothing left to give to and that had nothing left to give to me. I don’t know if I ever went into detail on this blog about why I resigned from that 8-year position, but to make a long story short - my spirit was disturbed. Some of the people at the job made me uncomfortable. I wasn’t totally into what I was doing, and I carried the weight of the job on my shoulders all the time which caused me to be constantly stressed and out of alignment in my personal life.

I revisit this story about quitting my job yearly so that I can remind myself of my bravery and also see how far I’ve come. I’m in a much better space now than I was then, but my spirit is starting to slightly nudge me again…suggesting that I’ve gotten all I needed to get from the space I’m in, and it’s time to change course. There’s another move I have to make, and I’m not sure how or when I will do it. I’m not even sure what it is. I just feel in my spirit that it’s time for me to transition, and I’m going to obey that feeling.

A major lesson I learned as a result of walking away from that 8-year job three years ago is that one of the most unproductive things I can ever do in life is ignore what’s in my spirit. My spirit is my most sacred guide - it’s my inner God. And when I ignore it, the consequences are heavy. Peace is everything to me, and I will rearrange, erase, start over, open doors, close windows, sage, and do everything else to get it and keep it. I’m not sure where my journey is leading me y’all, but I will make this known - this time around, it won’t take me 8-years to surrender to what’s boiling inside of me. When my spirit says jump, I’ll be ready….and you guys will be the first to know where I land.

The rest is still unwritten…..

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: African Print Top // Gold Fringe Halo Necklace // Drawstring Shorts (similar pair, here)