Quarantine Confession...

I have a confession. I think I may have played a part in conjuring up this crisis we are currently in *nervously bites nails*. I know, I know….I apologize! You see…I’m working on this manifestation thing, and I’m still learning how to be precise with the universe. But just hear me out before you plot my demise, okay?

About a month ago I was over everything that drained my energy. Men were getting on my last nerve, and the world was too loud for my central system. So I cried out to the universe (God), Mary, Joseph, Peter, friends, strangers, the trees, my ancestors, and whoever would listen and asked for a break. I repeatedly said I needed a break from men and the world. I said it so much that it was all I thought about. The next thing I knew the world started shutting down, and everyone was forced to watch the pandemonium unfold behind their sanitized doors. At first I didn’t connect my wishes to what was going on, but a question from a friend made me realize that my plead had been heard.

In an effort to look at the bright side of our current crisis, my friend decided to ask her social media followers what positive things were happening as a result of being quarantined. She stated that she had finally met her neighbor after being in her house for quite some time. Another person stated that they were able to spend more time with their kid. I’m an introvert so it didn’t take me long to come up with several positive things that have transpired during my quarantine. Hell, I self-quarantine every chance I get when the world is normal. But I decided to think beyond the surface before I answered the question….and it came to me. This quarantine gave me the break I had been manifesting since January.

I’ve been vowing to slow down since 2019, but every time I turned around something or someone was in my face. Being that I get my energy from solitude and there was no solitude happening in my world, I was internally drowning. I didn’t have time to sort things out or to make the best decisions because I felt overwhelmed. Creating was pushed to the back burner and dating even became a burden. I wanted a timeout so bad that I confessed to a gentleman, while sitting across from him on a date, that I needed a break from him and any species that resembled him. I was meeting this person over here, going to several events, taking a picture in between, and responding to requests, emails, texts, calls, and inquiries on top of all those things. IT WAS ABSOLUTELY TOO MUCH! So slowly I began to clear my schedule, but I wasn’t doing the best job at it; therefore, I asked for help. And boy did I get it!!

Although the reason behind this quarantine truly sucks, I can’t help but express my sincere gratitude for it. Not only am I completing a lot of tasks, I’m also getting that much-needed time to sort through some thoughts and feelings. My mindset is shifting. I’m relearning some things. I’m having essential, detailed conversations and enjoying the process of gradual maturation. When this is all said and done, I think I’m going to have an interesting story to share. Stay tuned y’all.

Quarantining and Smiling,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Relationship Pending Tee // Flare Pants

Photo Credit: 87 Photography