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Living Without Expectations

December 03, 2018 by Samjah Iman in Style

Years ago, I was having an in-depth conversation with a friend about relationships and expectations. During the conversation, he revealed to me that he doesn’t expect anything from anyone. He also went on to say that he doesn’t even expect his wife to come home every night. He said that his wife has a choice on whether or not she wants to return home that day and vice versa. They come home to each other not because they are expected to, but because they want to. Expectations do not govern their relationship…..love does. At the time of this conversation I was in my late 20’s. And by that time in my life I had been repeatedly let down by unmet expectations I placed on people. However, I still couldn’t digest what he was saying or the concept of living without expectations. But as life kept happening and I kept maturing, I totally got it.

People will fall short and things are always changing. Parents will forget, children will fail, wives will mess up, boyfriends will leave, friends won’t always answer the phone, etc. I’ve been in numerous situations where I’ve said, “I can’t believe he or she did that!” And now I think back to those times and wonder why I couldn’t believe it….he or she were human, and they did what we humans do - be imperfect.

I’ve come to realize that living without placing expectations on people is a more peaceful and less stressful way for me to go about life. And besides, placing expectations on people doesn’t give them the chance to reveal who they really are. I’d rather people exercise their free will and operate in their full truth instead of them faking the funk by trying to live up to the expectations I placed on them.

Take some of that unnecessary stress off your shoulders, let those expectations go.

Peace and Blessings,

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Vintage Lillie Rubin Jacket // Fringe Sandals



























































December 03, 2018 /Samjah Iman
Vintage Looks
Style
10 Comments

The Other Side Of The Game

December 13, 2017 by Samjah Iman in Style

I met a young lady who told me she wishes she had my life and that it seems I have it easy doing what I do.  My response to her was, "Girl I make it look easy, because it damn sure ain't." 

Everyone has a backstory to tell - and it ain't always pretty.  You see me posing effortlessly in a picture sporting a fly outfit and you may think "she's got it all."  But what you don't see is the intricate process involved in putting everything together just to be able to take that picture.  Or what you don't know is right before I took those fierce pictures, I probably just got through checking my bank account in hopes that a brand exhibited professionalism and paid an invoice on time only to find out that they hadn't.  You have no idea what is going on behind the scenes because all you see is the finished picture, and all you know is what you've presumed.  

A fun thing I like to do is watch documentaries/interviews or read autobiographies/biographies on celebrities.  It's interesting learning about their history.  Almost all of these wealthy, successful people that I read or watch a documentary/interview about have dealt with some type of traumatic experience that I would not EVER want to encounter.  For instance - I've learned that Oprah was raped when she was younger, comedian/actress Tiffany Haddish was a product of foster care and dealt with an abusive mother and husband, comedian Monique was living out of her car for a while, and soul legend Bobby Womack (google him youngsters) lost one son to a suicide, another infant son to suffocation and his brother was killed by a jealous girlfriend.  Crazy huh?! 

I write all of this to drive my point home about being grateful for your life.  Yes someone else's life can seem so enticing on the surface, but you never know what experiences constitute the person you see or what downfalls may have motivated the art they create.                

“If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.”
— Regina Brett

Before you wish your life was like someone else's, remember that there is ALWAYS the other side of the game.

- Samjah Iman

Outfit Details: Vintage Leather Trench Coat - My aunt's closet // Vintage Fendi Bag // Nike Tennis

Photo Credit: shotbyclipz@gmail.com

December 13, 2017 /Samjah Iman
Vintage Looks, samjah iman, Samjah Saulsberry, style & energy
Style
35 Comments
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